...the all new...

DALnet #macintosh Quotes Database

v1.4.1 — DB routines modernized, charset issues addressed ( 03.06.2022 )


#662   2/2/24 02:23 PM   <GoSox>  CuriosTiger is going to GGGGGGINAHHHH
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#661   3/13/23 03:33 AM   * who  who are you
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#660   3/6/22 04:17 PM   <identd>  Wow
    <identd>  Dal.net wiki page shows a picture of this channel
    <identd>  It even shows my old woot bot
    <GoSox>  is that it on the apple2?
    <identd>  Yup
    <identd>  Had to be blakespot
    <identd>  The link there shows 2007
    <GoSox>  i think 2007 was before my time
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#652   8/17/18 08:43 PM   <FourOhFour>  to be fair, reading old quotes is more entertaining than live chat
    <nacj>  yup
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#651   8/17/18 04:09 PM   <blakespot_wrk>  The DALmac Quotes database app has been updated, known issues fixed
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#639   11/23/16 09:02 PM   <Dusty-Mac>  and the fine nazi at alt-right
    <iWench>  "Making America Hate Again"
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#638   11/7/16 10:25 AM   <Dusty-Mac>  i drove a daewoo in chicago
    <Dusty-Mac>  it was kinda of a luxury car
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#636   5/5/16 02:13 PM   <Vicodin>  even in debt, I bet kanye is still eating steak and lobster on the regular
    <blakespot>  And a very large ass.
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#635   3/21/16 05:24 PM   <hoopy>  man you can do all kinds of shit with wontons
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#628   2/22/16 12:40 PM   <Dusty-Asus>  going to crusty on wednesday
    <lyfe2>  crusted butt?
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#627   1/17/16 11:52 PM   <@ryan42>  I have worked on the organ before
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#626   12/25/15 01:16 AM   <GoSox>  sometimes my client has a bitch of a time connecting
    <jadin>  thats good news
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#625   12/2/15 02:46 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  Missing _dave and his dislike of the !pizza game
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+++   11/30/15   /topic  Topic for #macintosh: Welcome to #Macintosh! | RIP Dave Waxman | ...
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#624   11/16/15 09:28 AM   <iPetGoat>  wait, did I just get disconnected?
    <->  iPetGoat has left IRC (Quit: )
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#623   11/16/15 09:28 AM   <iPetGoat>  wait, did I just get disconnected?
    <->  iPetGoat has left IRC (Quit: )
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#622   10/29/15 10:01 AM   <blakespo1>  So my MacBook has three dead keys
    <blakespo1>  a, 1, backspace
    <blakespo1>  How can I get access to the data in the machine?
    <jadin>  plug a keyboard in
    <Toren>  a keyboard
    <blakespo1>  ...ah.
    <blakespo1>  yes.
    * blakespo1  clears throat
    * Toren  gives blakespo1 another drink
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#621   10/24/15 11:37 AM   <Nelluk>  i went to my old hair cut chicks new basement indie setup a couple months ago. that was awkward enough. bonus is, Kara told me she liked my haircut when i got home
    <lyfe_>  barry being snappy out of nowhere. bold.
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#620   10/22/15 11:12 AM   <jadin>  🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮
    <jadin>  taco party yall
    <Nelluk>  id prefer a lemon party
    <jadin>  🍋
    <jadin>  thats for nelluk
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#619   10/20/15 11:16 AM   <jadin>  where do you go in your yaris
    <jadin>  ikea?
    <jadin>  i just cant imagine that you really need a car living in a big city like stockholm
    <lyfe_>  it's parked at my brother's house. i never use it. really hate driving.
    <lyfe_>  when i do use it it's mostly for ikea or pussy.
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#617   10/13/15 08:18 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  "Bridge of Spies" looks like a great flick.
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#616   10/13/15 07:12 PM   <lyfe_>  shitxiety. the fear that ndp is about to post a link any second.
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#615   10/10/15 07:52 PM   <NDPMacBook>  beautiful^disaster: A rare misfire from me. SOMEBODY SET US UP THE BOMB
    <lyfe_>  "a rare misfire" from ndp. oh man. that's rich.
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#614   9/26/15 07:53 PM   <@barrytoo>  i once had to wash my eye out
    <@barrytoo>  but i dont remember what i got in it
    <beautiful^disaster>  i do. It's not-work-safe tho.
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#613   9/24/15 08:04 PM   <@barrytoo>  i need vinegar
    <beautiful^disaster>  you're acidic enough on your own, barry
    <@barrytoo>  and i am not in liquid form
    <beautiful^disaster>  you're not a solid either; you're a gas. FOUL smelling too
    <@barrytoo>  that part is true
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#612   9/5/15 04:45 PM   < @LtKernelPanic>  i think i took a crap again already
    <@_dave>  You aren't sure if you took a crap?
    <@_dave>  Go change your underwear and figure that out first.
    <@_dave>  We'll work on the computer later.
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#607   8/2/15 12:12 AM   <beautiful^disaster>  I've had Five Guys French Fries...O M G
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#605   7/24/15 11:47 AM   <lyfe_>  her gravy is intimidating though.
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#604   7/21/15 09:37 PM   <Ambs>  Oh. I guess I should pay more attention to this window. I thought iWench was looking for a job making $1000 twerking robot butts.
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#603   7/21/15 09:35 PM   <Vicodin>  wench you clutz :P
    * /iWench  bows
    <iWench >  dats me
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#600   7/21/15 11:40 AM   <blakespot>  [7/21/15 8:21AM PDT] Ok - the DALmac quotes DB is fixed
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#599   7/21/15 11:29 AM   <@_dave>  The covering of holes with plates is jerky
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#595   7/10/15 09:02 PM   <NDPMacBook>  FourOhFour: I want you to lead the effort to bring Ms. Pao into #macintosh.
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#594   6/8/15 02:20 PM   <@_dave>  The app store recently passed gas.
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#592   6/4/15 04:23 PM   <lyfe_>  THE_GFR|WORK: i'm afraid nell doesn't get it right now.
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#591   5/1/15 06:33 PM   <Naczilla>  I hate condoms lined with sandpaper
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#590   5/1/15 12:48 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  no pebcak whatsoever
    <beautiful^disaster>  Apple Yoshitonme
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#589   4/28/15 10:32 PM   <@ryan42>  it took me about 15 second to negotiate my penis through the overlapping flaps during which time my shorts kept trying to cover the area of interest back up and once finished I had to practically take the underwear off to get the overlapping flaps to overlap each other in an even way again
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#588   4/28/15 10:26 PM   <@ryan42 >  How does it take LESS time to fish your penis through the underwear flaps than just slip the waistband down
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#587   4/28/15 10:25 PM   <@ryan42>  And then you still have to do some penile acrobatics to get it BACK through the other side.
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#586   3/27/15 04:02 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  TheLion-: the thunder just started again and the sky is the color of boiling shit.
    <barrytoo>  take pix
    <barrytoo>  ive never boiled it. only baked
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#585   3/25/15 02:39 PM   <_dave>  You fell on a shovel?
    <Keifer>  yes, stupidly
    <_dave>  Of course it was stupidly
    <_dave>  you fell on a shovel.
    <_dave>  There is no, "Fuck, I was smart as shit and doing something wise when I fell on a shovel."
    <_dave>  Might I suggest not slipping off the couch and falling on a rake?
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#584   3/16/15 02:59 AM   <THE_GFR>  jadin: can you imagine 2001 in 70mm?
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#583   3/11/15 02:39 PM   <Nelluk>  who would win, Mass. or Texas?
    <zamboli>  texas; way more guns
    <Zaren>  nad drones? shudder
    <NDPMacBook>  Nad drones are a Top Secret classified futurewar project.
    <EvlMinion>  are we going to teabag the enemy into submission?
    * EvlMinion  pictures one of our reaper drones with a set of testicles hanging from a trailer hitch on the back
    <NDPMacBook>  Aerial and Naval Teabagging units.
    <NDPMacBook>  The TBs will be fired in groups of 10 Sacs. Two Drone Nuts to a Sac. Each Sac will choose a unique target. Either direct kinetic strikes or explosive detonation will be used to disable the target.
    <FourOhFour>  Get a life.
    <FourOhFour>  Listening to your delusions while waiting for rsync to finish
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#577   1/30/15 06:54 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  i want more than 3" tonight
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#575   1/29/15 02:34 AM   * Grem1in  has joined #macintosh.
    <Grem1in >  <----- hears a train in the distance which wakes him, yet also lulls him back to sleep
    * Grem1in  has left #macintosh.
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#574   1/26/15 08:50 AM   * NDPTAL85  cuts EvlMinion on left side of face while whispering sociopathic sweet nothings into his right ear
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#567   1/13/15 04:12 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  There once was a man named zamboli... Who sold pizza but not macaroni... He wrote up a script. the channel then flipped, The winner then ordered pepperoni.
    <with Nelluks help>  There once was a man named zamboli... Who sold pizza but not macaroni... He wrote up a script. the channel then flipped, The winner then ordered pepperoni.
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#566   1/9/15 11:18 PM   <beautiful^disaster>  how big is it in inches?
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#564   11/20/14 12:07 PM   <Nactheknife>  TOUCH MY BOOBS
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#563   11/14/14 06:49 PM   <Nactheknife>  I deserve to be paid as channel fisker
    <_dave>  Nactheknife: Yes, you should be paid to be this channels official fisker
    <_dave>  fisker
    <_dave>  (Abbrebiation)
    <_dave>  Full definition: fucking ignorant, sexual kock eating rabbit.
    <_dave>  1. Yo, you are a fisker
    <_dave>  2. You have no right to say anything, you are a fisker.
    <_dave> 
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#562   11/11/14 10:41 AM   <Nelluk>  speaking of typos... wonder what lint is up to
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#561   11/10/14 09:57 PM   <barrytoo>  jadin go recriut some
    <jadin>  i keep trying but they arent interested for some reason
    <barrytoo>  you have to tell them there are normal people on irc, not just you
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#559   11/6/14 01:49 PM   <jadin>  "i noticed you farted 12 times in the past 3 hours. would you like us to ship you a bucket of Gas-X?"
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#558   10/30/14 01:58 PM   <Nactheknife>  there are quotes on here from me that I do not remember ever saying and couldn't have said
    <MisterE>  haha sabotage!
    <Nelluk>  name one that you find particularly unbelievable
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#557   10/30/14 01:53 PM   <Nelluk>  AAPL is the only stock i follow that is negative today. they just dont like the gays.
    <Nactheknife>  I don't believe that he's gay
    <Nelluk>  you want him to penetrate you to prove it?
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#556   10/29/14 12:14 PM   <CuriosTiger>  Bonjour.
    <barrytoo>  rendevouz
    <jadin>  avahi
    <Nelluk1>  sup idiots
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#555   10/11/14 12:24 AM   <Nac>  I too am ignorant.
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#554   9/25/14 04:33 PM   <Nac>  I have reverted to a polyphasic sleep schedule
    <Nac>  I sleep from roughly 5 am to 9:30 am and 3 pm
    <jadin>  can you extend that to include 9:30am to 3pm and 6pm to 5am
    <Nac>  no but I can extend a rotten corndog down your throat
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#553   9/12/14 12:51 PM   <hoopy>  what do you get when you pour rootbeer into a square glass?
    <hoopy>  beer!
    <hoopy>  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH
    <Nelluk>  damnit hoopy no
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#551   7/9/14 11:25 AM   <FourOhFour>  ​Old news, but... "I don't want to get into the debate about climate​ ​change, but I will simply point out that I think in academia we all​ ​agree that the temperature on Mars is exactly as it is here. Nobody will dispute that. Yet there are no coal mines on Mars. There are no​ ​factories on Mars that I'm aware of."​- Sen. Brandon Smith
    <MyPetGoat>  WTF?
    <FourOhFour>  Exactly.
    <FourOhFour>  https://www.bing.com/news/search?q=Sen.+Brandon+Smith&qpvt=Sen.+Brandon+Smith&FORM=EWRE
    <MyPetGoat>  state senator anyway.
    <_dave>  Really. How the fuck do Martians build UFOs to kidnap cows and farmers without factories!
    <_dave>  Asshole.
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#550   5/31/14 11:23 PM   <zambroli>  i pulled the trigger on the grinder
    <jadin>  going on gay dates now?
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#549   5/31/14 11:22 PM   <zambroli>  i pulled the trigger on the grinder
    <jadin>  going on gay dates now?
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#547   5/8/14 05:23 PM   <test>  test test test
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#542   5/6/14 12:08 AM   <barrytoo>  I gave him my hand, and he placed it in his unzipped pants.
    <ryan42>  awkward.
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#535   4/15/14 10:06 AM   <CuriosTiger>  Windows 8 is kinda like Microsoft Bob for Windows 7.
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#534   4/10/14 07:34 PM   <ryan42>  why would you want AMPS back?
    <FourOhFour>  ryan42: rural coverage actually existed
    <ryan42>  yes with the minor downside that the handsets gave you cancer
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#533   3/28/14 11:30 AM   <_dave>  Looks like this quotes database coder has no business in professional web programming.
    <_dave>  What does he do again?
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#532   3/28/14 11:27 AM   <MyPetGoat>  No car. Three bicycles. Two pairs of inline skates that might cost more than some of your cars.
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#529   3/3/14 09:23 PM   <Naczilla>  people made fun of us
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#528   2/12/14 01:20 PM   <Naczilla>  "Which of these Hollywood vaginas has the most juice?"
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#527   2/8/14 11:01 PM   <csmoll>  I have condoms made from hazmat suit material.
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#526   1/31/14 01:20 PM   <workspot>  How do you go fullscreen in Chrome iOS?
    <Nelluk>  workspot: scroll down.
    <Nelluk>  UI will recede into the night like one of your paid women
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#525   1/28/14 08:15 PM   <ryan42>  i don't even think I wanna understand this anymore.
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#524   1/18/14 06:39 PM   * cdiv  has joined #macintosh
    <cdiv>  Maybe this'll stay connected
    * cdiv  has quit [Read error: Connection reset by peer]
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#523   1/3/14 10:42 PM   * hoopy  points to jadin's dangle
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#522   12/6/13 07:15 PM   <chino>  look at it
    <chino>  it's stance..
    <chino>  it's wrists
    <chino>  cory?
    <chino>  would you say that's a gay robot?
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#521   12/1/13 11:27 AM   <Naczilla>  !find nelluk
    <jadin>  hes prob balls deep at the palamino
    <Naczilla>  don't you dare slander him
    <Naczilla>  he would never fuck a horse
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#520   11/18/13 10:17 PM   <ryan42>  Haunnakuh! Eye cam boozing enhanced dictation!
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#519   11/10/13 08:35 PM   <Naczilla>  he's an ivy league educated cosmologist and mathematician and probably wealthy-ish
    <Naczilla>  I'd fuck him
    <Nelluk>  whats a make-up artist need an ivy league education for
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#518   10/18/13 08:10 AM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  oh god so fallever drink
    * ShakenNot_Stirred  goes to bed
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#517   10/16/13 02:09 PM   <Naczilla>  I am so sick of having 7 gigs available HD space one minute and 0 the next
    <zamboli>  you filled it up
    * Naczilla  has quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
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#516   10/4/13 12:15 PM   <dillie>  that is a penis, Lutfisk
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#515   9/27/13 02:40 PM   <EvlMinion>  Nelluk: do you have stickers on your car showing that you ran half marathons and stuff
    <Neth>  I need to find one of the 0.0 stickers.
    * FourOhFour  slaps a 0.0 sticker on EvlMinion's forehead
    <nub>  except it's a price sticker, and it's full retail value
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#514   9/17/13 05:03 PM   <csmoll>  this new coworker doesn't squirt like the last coworker did
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#513   9/10/13 03:20 AM   <barrytoo>  they just don't make music like that anymore
    <chino>  thank goodness
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#512   8/8/13 11:37 AM   <EvlMinion>  man, I hope I never get pregnant
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#511   8/4/13 04:52 AM   <Naczilla>  E
    <Naczilla>  I want you to groom me, sensually
    <@MacServPro>  Even I am disgusted
    <zambo1i>  IT IS SENTIENT
    <@MacServPro>  who??! where??!
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#510   7/23/13 12:59 AM   <ryan42>  he did once say something relevant
    <barrytoo>  yea but that was in 2009
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#509   7/20/13 02:54 AM   <CuriosTiger>  I have a few more things I want to do tonight, so no benadryl. But I took a Claritin-D.
    <jadin>  the game is to pop a few benadryls and see how many times you can jerk it before you pass out
    <CuriosTiger>  That's a mental image I didn't need, jadin.
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#508   7/19/13 02:12 AM   <MisterE>  Personally, I think Naczilla is the smartest person in the world.
    * Naczilla  Blurgh.
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#507   7/19/13 02:05 AM   <ryan42>  MisterE: heh. Do you know how to go frame-by-frame in VLC?
    <MisterE>  Seriously ryan42? You really have to ask that?
    <Naczilla>  lol
    <ryan42>  I thought everyone knew, too.
    <Naczilla>  honestly why would anyone know that
    <MisterE>  wtf kind of retard would not know that in 2013?
    <Naczilla>  did you read a fucking VLC manual or something
    <barrytoo>  nac obviously doesn't
    <MisterE>  no way?
    <ryan42>  it's common knowledge at this point
    <Naczilla>  I assume you just randomly start pressing fucking buttons
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#506   7/17/13 02:47 AM   <CuriousTiger>  Damn skittish snake
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#505   7/11/13 11:35 PM   * Geeks  has joined #macintosh.
    <Geeks>  Sharknado. 'Nuff said.
    * Geeks  has left #macintosh.
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#504   7/11/13 04:18 PM   <Naczilla>  why am I horniest when I search for the porn, then when I find it, only kind of excited
    <Nelluk>  does it take you a long time to find it? are you finding a specific one you had in mind, or one that meets certain criteria?
    <MyPetGoat>  actually, he's filming them to spec
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#503   7/11/13 03:05 PM   <Toren>  why do NEW people call me, the Director of IT, when their PC has a problem?! [02:47:53]
    <Toren>  they should be told "call the HelpDesk"
    <Toren>  i can understand why other people would call me, they've known me since i was a PC Tech
    <EvlMinion>  Toren: Can you get away with this... "Did you try turning it off again?" if yes, transfer to the support crew
    <EvlMinion>  if no, transfer while they reboot
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#502   7/11/13 02:20 AM   <No_56>  I'm boring
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#501   7/11/13 12:42 AM   <ryan42>  Nac couldn't write a line of PHP to save his life.
    <barrytoo>  why would you want him to save his life
    <ryan42>  wow. good point
    <barrytoo>  it's really a win win
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#500   7/11/13 12:32 AM   <CuriosTiger>  is tempted to feed his snake again.
    <ryan42>  feed him Nac
    <CuriosTiger>  I don't want him to regurgitate. :(
    <Naczilla>  it's always the smartest person who's resented
    <Naczilla>  such is my curse
    <CuriosTiger>  Yeah, that's why we all hate...
    <CuriosTiger>  ...Ambs?
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#499   6/24/13 10:04 PM   <NDPMacBook>  WARNING Incoming MILFS WARNING
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#498   6/17/13 12:17 PM   <lyfe>  ryan42: i hope you are familiar with the old ritual of bringing a vintage fender rhodes when visiting sweden? it's an old viking ritual.
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#497   6/13/13 10:06 AM   <Jedichick>  i'm glad i called them though, i was like hey i think something is wrong with my unit. they came out, took the cover off, turned the air on, and the whole thing caught on fire
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#496   6/11/13 12:55 AM   <barrytoo>  at mac hack thre were like 5 females, 300 males
    <barrytoo>  2 of which were previously males
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#495   6/10/13 01:10 PM   <barrytoo>  ryan did ou see the ios7 icons
    <ryan42>  no
    <barrytoo>  are you prepared for a medial emergency
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#494   6/9/13 04:56 PM   <ryan42>  WHO ADDED A TURD TO CLARUS?!
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#493   5/16/13 04:55 PM   <Neth>  404: a fool and their money...
    <FourOhFour>  yup
    <Nelluk1>  ... what. FINISH IT
    <Neth>  it'll cost you a dollar.
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#492   5/10/13 04:03 AM   * Alcohog  rubs his fake bacon on Nac's face.
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#491   5/7/13 02:01 AM   <jadin>  but if i had to rank just based on outward attractiveness
    <jadin>  redheads would be pretty much at the bottom
    <jadin>  below blondes and then brunettes
    <barrytoo>  one on top of each other. that works
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#490   5/2/13 01:54 PM   <NDPTAL85>  Vanilla http://www.ice.gov/
    <NDPTAL85>  Alright stop, collaborate and listen, Homeland is back with a brand new invention
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#489   5/2/13 01:35 PM   <CuriosCat>  My next trip to Seattle will be by car.
    <barrytoo>  how bout truck and stop in san fran :)
    <CuriosCat>  barry: Sure, if you cover diesel.
    <barrytoo>  yu just need a cover? i have an old tarp that should work
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#488   5/1/13 03:08 PM   <Lutfisk>  she babysits a mule as a part time job
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#487   5/1/13 01:08 AM   <barrytoo>  i'm the one that wen tto high school with her
    <barrytoo>  just because it was a couple of decades apart doesn't matter
    <NDPTAL85>  My love for her knows no bounds.
    * CuriosTiger  punches NDP in the no-bounds.
    <NDPTAL85>  CuriosTiger: That was out of bounds.
    <barrytoo>  that was the idea
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#486   4/29/13 07:55 PM   <Chancelier>  hello , what is the command to ping ?
    <zambo1i>  guess
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#485   4/29/13 11:41 AM   <Naczilla>  I understand that this room is troubled by a paucity of sexy.
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#484   4/9/13 09:13 AM   <MisterE>  EvlMinion has class tho
    <Toren>  yeah, kindergarten
••
#483   4/5/13 12:32 AM   <zamboli>  Your web browser is Ronald Reagan
    <ryan42>  is it just me or do people keep saying things that don't make any sense?
••
#482   3/27/13 01:13 PM   <ryan42>  I get no relevant results when I google... http://www.google.com/#hl=en&output=search&sclient=psy-ab&q=FUCKING+SHIT+ASS+INDESIGN+CS6+FOR+MACINTOSH+BEACHBALLS+AFTER+EVERY+GOD+DAMN+LAUNCH&oq=FUCKING+SHIT+ASS+INDESIGN+CS6+FOR+MACINTOSH+BEACHBALLS+AFTER+EVERY+GOD+DAMN+LAUNCH
••
#481   3/24/13 07:47 PM   <zamboli>  you can't not pee for 1.5 hours
••
#480   3/20/13 09:26 PM   <zamboli>  my life has been pretty rad since i bought this bag of peas
••
#479   2/21/13 12:01 PM   <NDPTAL85>  Her fortunes would turn around for the better if she would simply sit on my face.
••
#478   2/10/13 09:26 PM   <Naczilla>  hey nelluk have you seen any puffy vaginas at the grammys yet
••
#477   2/5/13 05:42 PM   <NDPTAL85>  SINGLES IN AMERICA SURVEY: WONT DATE SOMEONE WHO IS 1. A Virgin 42%, 2. Has more than $5,000 in credit card debt 65% and 3. With substantial student loan debt 54%.
    <NDPTAL85>  Looks like Nac strikes out on all 3.
••
#476   1/30/13 09:10 PM   <EvlMinion>  the sun shines out of my ass, yo
••
#475   12/16/12 12:18 PM   <hoopy>  I have mixed feelings about procreating
••
#474   12/14/12 11:29 AM   <blakespot>  greetings
    <blakespot>  http://dukecannon.com/mangina.php
    <Nelluk>  no.
    <Nelluk>  percentage of blake links i click on: 3%. percentage of blake links that contain the string "gina" that I click on: 0%
••
#473   11/7/12 10:40 AM   <DataPig>  If you just want something cheap then buy cheap.
    <hoopy>  you're making so many assumptions
    <hoopy>  just stop talking
    <Nelluk>  is he drunk again
••
#472   11/2/12 10:07 PM   <brandonlp>  i bought an iPad mini
    <NDPMacBook>  brandonlp: You smug son of a bitch!
••
#471   10/28/12 04:08 PM   <ryan42>  barrytoo: you have an UltraPlex40?
    <barrytoo>  whats that
    <ryan42>  SCSI CD drive
    <barrytoo>  probably
••
#470   10/28/12 01:29 AM   <dusty>  went and played poo
••
#469   9/28/12 10:21 AM   <Nelluk>  women are fickle
    <Nelluk>  slip 'em a pickle
    <Nelluk>  that's my motto.
    <Jedichick>  ...
    <Nelluk>  maybe you don't get it
    <Jedichick>  oh i get it
    <NDPTAL85>  Women are fickle, slip em a pickle, give em a tickle, till they trickle
    <Nelluk>  ....
    <Jedichick>  lol
    <Jedichick>  thats even... better. yeah. that
••
#468   9/27/12 09:30 PM   <blakespot>  http://www.etsy.com/listing/88996953/fetus-soap
    <FourOhFour>  I think that URL says all I need to know about that link
••
#467   9/19/12 11:06 AM   <lyfe>  both of my parents were killed in a bizarre masticating juicer accident.
••
#466   9/18/12 07:46 PM   <EvlMinion>  alright. everybody watch out. I'm getting drunk and I have no pants on
••
#465   9/12/12 01:19 PM   <PetGoat2>  What's that app that gay men use for hookups?
    <PetGoat2>  there's one with GPS that shows you the penis of every gay man within 300 feet or something. It has apparently revolutionized the gay pickup scene in New York and San Francisco.
    <Nelluk>  'craigslist'
••
#464   9/4/12 12:46 PM   <zamboli>  lyfe, how's that 4G workin out
    <lyfe>  ...
    * lyfeMaker  has quit [Ping Timeout]
••
#463   8/16/12 11:44 AM   <Jedichick>  i finally bought my hot pants
    <Jedichick>  i hope my ass is small enough
••
#462   8/3/12 10:16 AM   <Naczilla>  I give you this link because I can't rub my fingers on my taint and put them under your nose
••
#461   7/29/12 10:11 PM   <ryan42>  wonder how I goet taht because that's mont my lgoing lnaemn
    <ryan42>  and ther aer other ryan42w
    <ryan42>  woah that got linty
    <FourOhFour>  You're chan-- yeah
    * FourOhFour  hands ryan42 the dustbuster
••
#460   7/24/12 01:23 PM   <hoopy>  on the odd crazy night i've smoked 3 packs
    <Nelluk>  i dont know if anyone has ever told you this but that is bad for you
••
#459   7/24/12 10:55 AM   <Neth>  open Chick-Fabulous as a competitor
    <Neth>  have openly gay bulls in the advertisements.
    <Neth>  your slogan can be "Eat Mor Cock"
••
#458   6/13/12 05:00 PM   < NDPTAL8>  You have to put it in their mouths to make them be quiet
    < NDPTAL8>  And by it, I mean your cock.
    <ZARDOZ>  NDPTAL85: Is "cock" a metaphor for something?
    <zamboli>  a rooster
    <ZARDOZ>  Would a rooster fit in a woman's mouth?
    <ZARDOZ>  Maybe you just put part of the rooster in. Like, maybe it's dick.
••
#457   6/13/12 03:39 PM   <Lutfisk>  my mom & dad are still lickin it
    <Lutfisk>  um
    <Lutfisk>  kinckin it
••
#456   6/12/12 01:34 PM   <Neth>  yeah, food in a strip club just seems like a bad idea. food at a gun range? maybe also a bad idea.
••
#455   6/11/12 02:04 PM   <WWDCspot>  That retina MBP -- man, a vagina hanging off of it would hardly make it finer than it is
    <_dave>  WWDCspot: You're pretty sex deprived, eh?
••
#454   5/15/12 12:34 PM   <Nelluk>  where is dillie
    <Nelluk>  i SUMMON DILLIE
    * dillie  (~Jen@207.32.60.196) has joined #macintosh
    <Nelluk>  holy shit
••
#453   4/18/12 02:57 PM   <lyfeMaker>  love is a special thing between one man and two girls.
••
#452   4/10/12 04:13 PM   <Nelluk>  i have been neglecting the DD lately
    <NDPTAL85>  A nice set of DDs should never be neglected
••
#451   4/4/12 09:32 AM   <MyPetGoat>  hi kids
    <Neth>  a goat calling us kids. nice.
••
#448   3/13/12 11:51 AM   <Nelluk>  when i was planning my friends bachelor party i made a spreadsheet that compared various itineraries by cost per stripper minute
    <Jedichick>  .......
    <Jedichick>  have you been evaluated for OCD
••
#447   2/26/12 01:09 PM   <Toren>  "i love eating Tim's Holes"
••
#446   2/20/12 03:48 PM   <Lint>  panera is like $.01/calories
••
#445   2/15/12 10:41 AM   <Lutfisk>  Nelluk can you imagine being married to blake?
    <Nelluk>  no.
••
#444   2/13/12 06:34 PM   <k-d>  it is one prong many places need, yes
••
#443   2/10/12 03:14 PM   <Lutfisk>  Ludington is the fifth-most-popular tourist city in Michigan, behind Mackinaw City, Traverse City, Muskegon, and Sault Ste. Marie.
    <barrytoo>  where is climax michigan?
    <barrytoo>  on that list
    <barrytoo>  i know where it is on the map heh
    <Lutfisk>  I've been to climax
    <barrytoo>  i haven't. we missed the turnoff for it
    <Lutfisk>  oh, so you drove into Taint
••
#442   2/9/12 12:06 PM   * FrauK  dumdidums
••
#441   2/9/12 12:05 PM   <MyPetGoat>  meh. wife just announced she's going to a book party tonight so I need to head home early and put the kids to bed, etc.
    <MyPetGoat>  I think I'm going to let them watch Harold & Kumar in 3D. She won't do this again.
••
#440   2/7/12 03:41 PM   <_dave>  Wait, wait wait
    <_dave>  Questions about marriage before testing the product?
    <brandonlp>  you assume i haven't?
    <barrytoo>  we all do
    <_dave>  TRY BEFORE YOU BUY!
••
#439   2/5/12 05:34 PM   <blakespot>  Goddman it
    <blakespot>  my cat just set his anus on my toe
    <blakespot>  fucking cat
    <barrytoo>  wiggle your toe
••
#438   2/3/12 10:46 AM   <Nac>  the cat I torture is pregnant
    <Nac>  almost certainly
    <Nelluk>  are you the father?
    <blakespot>  I guess your last bit of torture went too far...
••
#437   2/2/12 03:07 PM   <Zaren>  *sigh* student emails public list, asking someone to save a "trapped" squirrel
    <NDProBook>  Is it stuck in Richard Gere's ass?
••
#436   2/1/12 05:29 PM   <Lutfisk>  I didn't know what a deuce coupe was
    <jadin>  is that a car that you take a dump in
••
#435   1/23/12 10:32 AM   <catchick>  wasn't there a Collin Quinn on MTV years ago?
    <Zaren>  yeah, part of Remote Control, their game show
    <Nac>  he admits to having fucked a cat when he was a teenager
    <catchick>  what??
    <catchick>  i think i just went blind
••
#434   1/13/12 12:07 PM   <Jedichick>  well i am fine with her knowing the difference between male and female, but she doesn't gotta go around talking about boys nuts
••
#433   1/10/12 02:13 PM   <hoopy>  i made out with a girl who lives in washington dc
    <hoopy>  because we were both drunk
••
#432   1/10/12 11:37 AM   <Nelluk>  i am forced to conclude that NDP is the most subtle troll we have ever had on irc, and he has been fucking with us for years
••
#431   1/10/12 08:15 AM   <blakespot>  So my rev 1 Mac Pro sold for just over $1,500
    <Nac>  are you ashamed
    <blakespot>  nay
    <Nac>  perhaps you should be
••
#430   1/5/12 10:18 AM   <Nac>  perhaps I can have the sex
••
#429   1/4/12 03:19 PM   <_dave>  I think I am oficially an executive.
    <_dave>  I just responded to an email with two paragraphs and never answered the question asked.
••
#428   1/3/12 09:45 AM   <catchick>  years ago i went to a very small gallery opening, very late at night. It was in a shared building. A friend and i were sitting in a dark room in the back when a very strange lady appeared in the doorway, put her arms up against the door jam, wearing a flowing robe and said,
    <catchick>  "are you ready for your colonic irrigation?"
    <catchick>  I don't think i've ever left a gallery faster.
••
#427   1/2/12 10:49 AM   <blakespot>  I have been sitting at this desk so long in the last 18 hours that my taint is literally numb.
••
#426   12/29/11 11:37 PM   * DataPig1  poops in Nac's mouth
••
#425   12/20/11 09:37 AM   <Neth>  maybe if the greeks had let us know about this yummy yogurt sooner their economy wouldn't have been so bad off.
    <MisterE>  heh
    <MisterE>  well they did give us anal sex
    <MisterE>  but I guess that doesn't pay much
••
#424   12/14/11 01:10 PM   <Toren>  Cornhole Connection sounds like a dating site
••
#423   12/10/11 12:49 AM   <DataPig>  KU is what, Kock University?
••
#422   12/8/11 02:49 PM   <NDPMacBookPro>  My Droid v1 shit the bed yesterday
    <NDPMacBookPro>  Apps wouldn't access the internet anymore
    <NDPMacBookPro>  Forced to restore it to factory defaults
    <NDPMacBookPro>  Now I need to figure out how to get all my old apps back
    <Neth>  sync it with itunes
    <Neth>  oh, wait.
    <NDPMacBookPro>  Neth: You smug son of a bitch!
••
#421   12/8/11 11:37 AM   <Lutfisk>  I sent my parents an email and cc'd my sibs telling my mom that if she's been keeping the baby books up-to-date it's time to add a page for "baby's 1st colonoscopy"
••
#420   12/7/11 01:10 PM   <Lutfisk>  watching blagojevich sentencing
    <blakespot>  There sits a man 'neath a hairnest of douchebaggery.
••
#419   12/2/11 08:51 AM   <Mornx>  my scrotum tightens automatically when I ejaculate in my pants after a keynote
••
#418   11/28/11 05:36 PM   <_dave>  I actually make my wife a brownie using nothing but a brownie mix and a diet coke.
••
#417   11/21/11 10:22 PM   <Lint>  my voice is my password
    <barrytoo>  good thing your typing isn't
••
#416   11/15/11 01:34 PM   <TheNavyBear>  Out of the 98 pics I have posted in here, 2 have been nude guys
••
#415   11/14/11 10:15 PM   <MisterE>  I reside around ryan42's pole
••
#414   11/14/11 06:05 PM   <blakespot>  http://retrocosm.net/2011/11/14/ssd-in-a-powermac-g4-cube/
    <NDPMacBookPro>  Obscene
••
#413   10/19/11 11:17 AM   <Nelluk>  i pretty much dont watch any video that people send me
    <Nelluk>  unless it has a synopsis attached which sounds awesome
    <lyfeMaker>  too busy with fancy stuff?
    <Nelluk>  that's right
••
#412   9/22/11 01:33 AM   <MisterE>  I specialize in ass slapping
••
#411   8/31/11 05:43 PM   <Geeks>  man my IR controller for my Griffen Helo is DOA :(
    <RyanOnPPC>  make sure the volume is up alllll the way geeks.
    <Geeks>  I did
    <Geeks>  and in airplane mode
    <barrytoo>  that's your problem
    <barrytoo>  you need helicopter mode
••
#410   8/30/11 07:04 PM   <lee>  I am going to investigate the inside of my eyelids
••
#409   8/30/11 05:06 PM   <clam>  One of my friends recently got married at a place that charges $10K+ just to rent the venue.
    * clam  will just note that he paid far less than that, and he had *giraffes*.
••
#408   8/29/11 02:04 PM   <irving>  i need 6 fake corndogs by wednesday night. HELP!
••
#407   8/26/11 01:22 PM   <Nelluk>  im not saying i'm particularly black but there are a lot of very, very white people here :P
••
#406   8/19/11 06:08 PM   <blakespot>  I'd like to rape a RealDoll that has the letters CSS carved in its back
••
#405   8/12/11 08:17 PM   <DogCow>  ok I am standing on the tip of the penis
    <slangley>  That looks like an elongated J to me.
••
#404   8/12/11 08:17 PM   <DogCow>  ok I am standing on the tip of the penis
••
#403   8/12/11 03:43 PM   <clam>  I remember seeing someone at a highway construction site whose entire job appeared to consist of holding up a 'SLOW' sign.
    <clam>  I've always thought it would be depressing to know that your job could be replaced by a robot, but this was someone whose job could be replaced by a *stick*
••
#402   7/26/11 11:37 AM   <brandonlp>  every time i reboot my Mac, i'm impressed by Resume
    <NDPTAL85>  That sounds a bit like an 80s song
••
#401   7/22/11 04:55 PM   <chino>  I really have never, knowningly.. used my op powers on any humans
    <chino>  guess I just lost my opstick virginity
••
#400   6/8/11 12:42 PM   <Geeks>  heh looks like my 60gb backup took until 30 mins ago
    <Geeks>  oh wait, it finished at 1:29am, hmm, wonder what kept the machine awake all night
    <Geeks>  nightmares, I guess
••
#399   5/26/11 11:32 PM   <DamnHippie>  Third world nations get Doctors Without Borders, but the best we can do is SNS Without Pants. What's our crime to deserve this?
••
#398   5/26/11 11:26 PM   * Ambs  realizes that he's up at 5 AM discussing the effects of cranberry juice on prostate cancer with an elven mage and a dwarven cleric, and considers getting some sleep
••
#397   5/26/11 11:23 PM   <[OmegentooX]>  hmm, what should I eat now...physics exam in 2 hours
    <GeeksOnAlBook>  ass ploding runny chili
    <GeeksOnAlBook>  when he shoves his finger into your prostate, even though you are young and don't need it checked but we've established that you are man meat, you'll let go in fiery retribution
    <[OmegentooX]>  GeeksOnAlBook, what the HELL?
    <GeeksOnAlBook>  oh
    <GeeksOnAlBook>  he said physics exam
    <X86BSD>  this is very disturbing
    * X86BSD  cowers in fear
    <GeeksOnAlBook>  I thought he said physical exam ROFL
    <[OmegentooX]>  You freak!
    <[OmegentooX]>  FREAK!
••
#396   5/26/11 11:19 PM   <blakespot>  hey did u hear some co-worker walked into my office and gave me a great condition B&W G3 350? Out of the blue. I gave it to a co-worker for his kid.
    <Keifer>  you traded a G3 for someone's kid? Are you really ready to be a parent?
••
#395   5/26/11 11:17 PM   <blakespot>  Interesting: [link posted]
    <Lutfisk>  b-spot: that's a couple days old
    * blakespot  looks for the "we only serve it out hot and fresh" sign written on his ass
    <blakespot>  err
    <blakespot>  back sounds better
••
#394   5/26/11 11:14 PM   * Lutfisk  Lutfisk idly wonders why blakespot's putting condoms onto broomsticks
    <blakespot>  thos similar in dimensions, that is not a broomstick, Lutfisk
    <Lutfisk>  We're very full of ourselves, aren't we?
    <blakespot>  I can't quite craft the comeback that's just begging to be born, Lut
    <Neth>  "bend over and you can be full of me too?"
    <blakespot>  gak!
••
#393   5/26/11 11:10 PM   <funkybutt>  i'm talking about having sex with children
    <Lutfisk>  funkybutt: don't do it! Resist the urge!
••
#392   5/26/11 11:10 PM   <blakespot>  This girl told her mom we were having sex, in high school - it was bizarre and not to my liking.
    <Keifer>  The sex was bizarre and not to your liking?
••
#391   5/26/11 11:08 PM   <funkybutt>  how do you spell the word for those European ass washers?
    <Lutfisk>  bidet, unless you mean Cardo :p
    <funkybutt>  I used the one we had in Italy...but I never felt like I was doing it right
    <Lutfisk>  if you were drinking out of it, you weren't
    <funkybutt>  there really wasn't enough water pressure
    <Cardo>  funkybutt, you don't use them for colonal irrigation =P
    <funkybutt>  so Cardo...do you fill it up and then just sit in the water or what?
    <Cardo>  fill it up? Jesus, that'll take ages...turn on the tap, and wash your ass.
••
#390   5/26/11 11:04 PM   <Ambs>  lee is babysitting? there's a scary thought
    <Ambs>  (at the end of the night when the parents return: 'did you cahange him?' 'Probably.'
••
#389   5/26/11 11:02 PM   <Pasi>  random_c: I want to make love to you in the worst way!
    <Keefer>  standing in a hammock?
••
#388   4/21/11 02:56 PM   <Lutfisk>  my comedic genius is wasted on you people.
••
#387   4/18/11 03:18 PM   <Geeks>  "can I get semen instead of soy?"
••
#386   4/18/11 01:38 PM   <MeAndIt>  Strippers are the larval form of hookers
••
#385   4/5/11 03:57 PM   <iLilana>  why would people use it anyway
    <Nelluk>  use what?
    <iLilana>  logmein
    <Lint>  becuase they want to login to a remote computer
    <iLilana>  but is that all its used for?
    <Lint>  no it also makes scones
••
#384   4/4/11 08:54 AM   <Vicodin>  now I'm having some diet ginger ale with a bit of sour apple vodka, I didn't think it would work but the ginger and apple is nice together.
    <blakespot>  dude it's 7:30am
    <Vicodin>  3 hours earlier here.
    <blakespot>  my goodness
••
#383   4/1/11 02:04 PM   <Keifer>  wow, there's about 18 people at whatever the indians call their stadium
    <jadin>  call center?
    <Nelluk>  that was almost funny
••
#382   3/23/11 02:21 PM   * CuriosTiger  replaces brandonlp's head with a PowerMac G4 Cube
    <Lint>  cc: is it w orking g4 or theo nes that displenses tissues?
    * CuriosTiger  adds "displense" to his lintionary.
••
#381   3/3/11 09:36 PM   <SNS|MBP>  The thing is, if it's going to boot, it should boot in about 8 seconds. Otherwise I just get the broken NO symbol across the apple
    <SNS|MBP>  Shit. Not gonna boot.
    <SNS|MBP>  What am I forgetting?
    <FourOhFour>  To write down the bios settings before fucking with them.
    * FourOhFour  ducks
••
#380   2/22/11 12:35 AM   <blakespot>  WTF
    <blakespot>  there is no recorded footage of giraffes having sex it seems
    <blakespot>  and I just got rick rolled
••
#379   2/22/11 12:17 AM   <funkybutt>  i'm talking about having sex with children..
••
#378   2/18/11 01:50 PM   <MyPetGoat>  I haven't buried my face in a guy's crotch since 8th grade and I don't miss it.
••
#377   2/9/11 01:03 PM   <_dave>  Heh, wife must have filled her work water bottle up this morning and forgotten to refill the Britta.
    <_dave>  Guess I am drinking beer w/ lunch
••
#376   2/9/11 11:20 AM   <Nelluk>  all my links are guaranteed to contain 100% stupid
••
#375   2/7/11 03:48 PM   <Lutfisk>  it's about 14 feet long
    <Lutfisk>  has a thing that looks like a warming oven at the end
    <blakespot>  O_o
••
#374   2/4/11 11:06 AM   <Lutfisk>  I think the puddle of oil under my snowthrower is a bad sign
••
#373   2/1/11 04:16 PM   <Lutfisk>  wow
    <Lutfisk>  I can no longer see the buildings 600 feet away
    <Nelluk>  keep transmitting until thelast possible moment lutfisk
    <Nelluk>  we won't forget you
••
#372   1/28/11 01:38 PM   <nub>  oh hey everybody i have news
    <nub>  i made something pretty cool
    <nub>  http://i.imgur.com/SqUyB.jpg
••
#371   1/27/11 02:34 PM   <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  Damnit Apple, STOP "CORRECTING" ME WHEN I TYPE THE WORD 'SHIT'!
    <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  Also, stop converting "hell" to "he'll"
    <Nelluk>  you shouldnt be typing hell
    < InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  Go to he'll.
••
#370   1/25/11 04:11 PM   * Lutfisk  laughs at a mental image of a guy humping a cow's ear
••
#369   1/11/11 12:11 PM   <FourOhFour>  winter storm warning :-D
    <FourOhFour>  4-8" tonight, 6-10" tomorrow
    <Nekokarasu>  I'm pretty sure I saw an advert for a mens product that made the same predictions...
••
#368   1/7/11 12:14 AM   <EvlMinion>  you know Monster's on crack when Apple's price on cables is reasonable
••
#367   1/2/11 09:36 AM   <FourOhFour>  damn it.
    <FourOhFour>  My new monitor hums.
    <FourOhFour>  It didn't yesterday.
    <Lint>  doesnt know the words huh?
••
#366   12/20/10 01:25 PM   <blakespot>  woah
    <blakespot>  Maggie Gyllenhaal married Peter Sarsgaard -- did they have the wedding in a friggin mead hall?
••
#365   12/15/10 11:55 AM   <Nac->  you want to fuck an antiquated computer?
    <blakespot>  sure
    <blakespot>  if I could
    <blakespot>  definitely I would
••
#364   12/13/10 05:26 PM   <chino-->  -1 here now
    <LtKernelPanic>  balmy 12 here
    <VetteWork>  45F low tonight :(
    <Lutfisk>  stfu.
    <EvlMinion>  seconded
    <chino-->  turded
    <Zaren>  motion carried!
    <VetteWork>  :(
••
#363   12/3/10 03:38 PM   <blakespot>  is samrod still alive?
    <barrytoo>  he runs a brothel in east los angeles
••
#362   12/3/10 03:23 PM   <irving>  i used to have one that was like 9-10 inches long in a nice little box
••
#361   11/18/10 01:23 PM   <blakespot>  Almost nothing is better than sideboob
••
#360   11/14/10 12:23 PM   <EvlMinion>  iPhone-Nac: I have hair on my junk with more deific power than you
••
#359   11/12/10 02:44 PM   <Nelluk>  uncircumcised penises rank among my least favorite of all penises
••
#358   11/9/10 04:34 PM   <Ambs>  One of my servers is swearing to me that it doesn't have an ethernet card. I'd be much more inclined to believe that if it weren't telling me that over ethernet.
••
#357   11/7/10 03:20 PM   <TheNavyBear>  I need Logic Express help, is there a Logic channel?
    <DogCow>  The chicken came first.
    <Lint>  p != !p
    <DogCow>  if A < B, then B > A
••
#356   11/5/10 11:47 PM   <DataPig>  Does anyone else find it amusing that I use Kosher salt for brining pork belly
••
#355   10/21/10 01:33 PM   <blakespot>  Fraukie's article is top story on MacRumors
    <blakespot>  nice
    <barrytoo>  that's a serious hole
    <blakespot>  don't talk about FrauK like that!
••
#354   10/14/10 11:50 AM   <blakespot>  the people on the ground should've all dressed up in Planet of the Apes costumes to greet the emerging miners
    <Lutfisk>  blake: damn you all to hell!
••
#353   9/27/10 04:33 PM   <TheNavyBear>  why is my PowerMac smoking?
    <barrytoo>  because it just had sex
    <irving>  did it just have interddammit barry
••
#352   9/26/10 09:08 PM   <SweetHaven>  so, TheNavyBear, you are sol
    <TheNavyBear>  huh?
    <ryan42>  she said you need to buy a new computer.
••
#351   9/13/10 03:07 PM   <NDPTAL85>  Report.
    <_dave>  NDPTAL85: You're still a giant tool
    <_dave>  NDPTAL85: /end report
    <NDPTAL85>  _dave: Excellent work Ensign.
••
#350   9/13/10 11:18 AM   <Nac>  I may have to break up with a dude today
••
#349   9/13/10 10:00 AM   <FourOhFour>  sleep is no substitute for caffeine
••
#348   9/2/10 07:20 PM   * clam  dressed his 15" MBP as a ThinkPad for Halloween last year.
••
#347   8/31/10 08:18 PM   <blakespot>  I need an inflatable Steve Jobs to rape
••
#346   8/30/10 01:59 PM   <Nelluk>  nac doesnt know when to stop
    <blakespot>  such a character flaw can turn a romp in the bedroom into a necrophelia rap
••
#345   8/18/10 10:21 AM   <chino>  ][23:46] they can suck my inverted cock
••
#344   8/17/10 01:28 PM   * EvlMinion   breaks Vicodin down into his component parts and buries them in the back yard
    <Vicodin>  just make sure to cut me on the scored part ;)
••
#343   8/15/10 05:37 PM   <A-F-K>  Exposed to deadly WiFi radiation, young Peter Parker finds himself with all the powers of a wireless network device... and all the problems of a high school student!
    <A-F-K>  Must... route... packets... Gwen Stacy's life... in balance... musn't let Aunt May's Facebook page... go down.... ARGHHH!
••
#342   8/12/10 03:53 PM   <MyPetGoat>  I seem to have prodded Pandora into a mode wherein it is playing only songs by Tom Waits and Randy Newman. I will name this "Froggy Voice Channel."
••
#341   8/12/10 07:19 AM   <CatCow>  I fucking hate windows
    <CatCow>  in the middle of a game
    <CatCow>  it forces everything to quit
    <CatCow>  and reboots
    <CatCow>  and then runs chkdsk
    <CatCow>  and then installs the windows updates
    <CatCow>  one of the most retarded things Ive ever seen a computer do
    <CatCow>  no warning, no option to wait
    <CatCow>  just BOOM everything goes away in the middle of doing something
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#340   8/11/10 11:37 AM   <irving>  i used face time last night
    <Nelluk>  with who
    <irving>  some fat chick who needed money
    <Nelluk>  ...
    <irving>  oh yeah and she used to be a man
    <Zaren>  ,,,
    <irving>  oh yeah and has no teeth
    <jadin>  your mom?
    <irving>  ha
    <irving>  well i was waiting for SOME kind of retort to that, but nothing so old-school. i tip my hat, jadin
••
#339   8/10/10 12:41 PM   <blakespot>  hm
    <blakespot>  Kim Kardashian has a pretty cool looking vagina
••
#338   8/4/10 09:54 AM   <blakespot>  my cap is oozing
    <Toren>  eww
    <Toren>  keep it in the bedroom, man
••
#337   8/3/10 11:10 PM   <NDPMacBook>  1. The people in the US Military who are there want to be there, they volunteered.
    <NDPMacBook>  2. Our military needs wars from time to time in order to stay sharp and not become rusty.
    <NDPMacBook>  3. The leader who was deposed was a horrible person.
    <FourOhFour>  W. T. F.
    * Zaren  blinks
    <FourOhFour>  You are really arguing that we should fight wars because the military needs practice?
    <FourOhFour>  We should send people to die for exercise?
    <NDPMacBook>  Just once per decade.
••
#336   8/2/10 11:22 AM   <TheNavyBear>  test, am I connected?
    <Nelluk>  nope
    < InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  With you we're never sure
    * TheNavyBear  has quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
••
#335   8/2/10 10:46 AM   <TheNavyBear>  WOW! I am offering free WiFi (using Internet sharing on Mac using BB for net) on Amtrak, and some dude just came up here bitching its too slow to watch YouTube... I told him it was FREE to go sit his ass back down...
••
#334   7/30/10 12:27 PM   <chinodroid>  I am using a frew keyboard called thickkeys. I weem to be making less typos using this
••
#333   7/29/10 11:55 PM   <ryan42>  You know it's going to be a good day when you show up for a consulting job and the server's name is a2efsy1jfquzghj and a postit note on the monitor reads "Set prmsions 777 fixes everything"
••
#332   7/14/10 02:01 PM   <EvlMinion>  _dave: ha! you can go to jail for that, you know!
    <_dave>  EvlMinion: Well, if I go to jail at least I can expect to get pounded in the ass and not paid for it; unlike corporate
    <_dave>  America where I expect but don't receive the compensation.
••
#331   7/13/10 11:27 PM   <Eyjafjallajokul>  raising NDP was a job, beleve you me
    <NDPTAL85>  Not much just dragging ass to do my laundry
    <NDPTAL85>  Eyjafjallajokull: You unpronounceable son of a bitch!
••
#330   7/13/10 09:56 PM   <DataPig>  Heh, ok my meat is rubbed. ;)
••
#329   7/6/10 11:38 PM   <Eye_Mac>  I had a crank caller last night
    <Eye_Mac>  I was bored, talked to her for 35 minutes
    <Eye_Mac>  she called again today and chatted another 10 minutes
••
#328   6/30/10 04:09 PM   <Geeks>  imagine a super small MEMS that you could drink and it would help with an erratic beat of a heart
    <Geeks>  determine how the electrons are flowin, what's the oxygen count, the electrical power in the cells
    <EvlMinion>  that would be pretty awesome
    <Geeks>  seek out the cells forcing the issue and shut them down
    <Geeks>  right in the middle of fixing your heart it pops up "rebooting to install SP3"
    <EvlMinion>  what would go on the coroner's report for cause of death?
    <Geeks>  "Microsoft"
    <EvlMinion>  LOL
••
#327   6/21/10 12:57 PM   <Ben^>  damnit, the roomba just ran off with my shoes.
••
#326   6/21/10 01:27 AM   <blakespot>  I almost raped a man tonight
••
#325   6/15/10 04:11 PM   * Lutfisk  licks his balls contemplatively
••
#323   6/12/10 09:50 PM   <EvlMinion>  It's really annoying when you're looking at po.. er, researching a topic on wikipedia and a tab crashes, then takes the entire browser with it
••
#322   6/11/10 01:43 PM   <jadin>  i wasnt aware that being retarded gave you an extended return policy
••
#321   6/8/10 07:54 PM   <Nac>  it's only a matter of time before blakey starts bangin' random tail
    <Nac>  I drove in a car to an abandoned cemetery to do it yesterday
••
#320   6/5/10 10:42 PM   <EvlMinion>  I'm so full of awesome I'm practically my own element on the periodic table. EvlMinium is what it'd be called
    <poonah>  noble yet inert
••
#319   6/2/10 12:32 PM   <Nac>  I got a profile shot of myself in a rest stop mirror
    <Nelluk>  did you crop out the guy giving you a BJ
••
#318   5/28/10 11:04 AM   * crawdiddly  dances about funkybutt
    * funkybutt  pinches crawdiddly's tail and squeezes and sucks his head
    <Nelluk>  dont encourage him
    <Nac->  good lord
••
#317   5/16/10 12:52 PM   <blakespot>  the P4 has a pipe as long as my cock
••
#316   5/13/10 02:43 PM   <_dave>  Spain was awesome
    <Zamboli>  i went to spain in my teens
    <_dave>  Zamboli: The Inquisition is now over, it's much better.
••
#315   5/11/10 12:52 PM   <Nelluk>  eh im not going to put the full court press on a lesbian but i'll flirt with her and see what happens
••
#314   5/4/10 02:00 PM   <Nelluk>  i found a typo in A Cold Blood this morning
    <Nelluk>  er, In Cold Blood
••
#313   4/15/10 01:39 PM   <marlxx>  Toren: i pulled it out, believe me. just after i learned that when it bulges, it's about to explode.
••
#312   4/15/10 11:48 AM   <EvlMinion>  one of the mounts i collected is your mom
••
#311   4/14/10 10:02 AM   <KingDana>  When I did it with my wife, it took us I think 10 minutes to figure it out
••
#310   4/8/10 09:17 PM   <FrauK>  it arrived. and it's so friggin sexy.
••
#309   4/7/10 03:53 PM   <Lutfisk>  I can't do a search with penis in the keywods - it just blocks it
    <Nelluk>  you must have hit your quota
••
#308   3/26/10 11:07 AM   <Lutfisk>  the little burgers at BK is are far superior to sliders
    <Lutfisk>  burger shots
    <Ben^>  BK is not good for you.
    <Lutfisk>  I don't care of BK is cancerous. I'd still eat there before I'd go back to white castle
••
#307   3/18/10 03:42 PM   <Ambs>  It's always a bad sign when your database tries to invoke your toaster
••
#306   3/10/10 12:18 PM   <digicow>  I'm gonna train my children to say sudo instead of please
••
#305   3/7/10 09:16 PM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  Suck my cheese filled ass.
••
#304   3/7/10 08:19 PM   <blakespot>  I think I just watched the best clip of anal porn I've ever seen
••
#303   3/4/10 01:02 PM   <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  Damn. Opera 10.5 still doesn't fix the issue I had with 10.10.
    <cdiv>  which issue is that?
    <EvlMinion>  he's using Opera.
    * cdiv  runs EvlMinion through the wood chipper again
••
#302   3/4/10 01:01 PM   * CuriosTiger  wanders in and runs EvlMinion through a wood chipper. Twice.
    <EvlMinion>  dick
    <CuriosTiger>  EvlMinion: that part was included, yes
••
#301   3/1/10 11:46 PM   <jadin>  jay leno makes me suck
••
#300   2/27/10 12:20 AM   <jadin>  good lord i am uquite intoxicated
••
#299   2/21/10 03:08 PM   <Zaren_>  you're just jealous
    <Zaren_>  ...sex the other guy on irc on a Sunday afteroon
    <Zaren_>  er, sex
    <Zaren_>  damn autocomplete
    <Zaren_>  sez
••
#298   2/21/10 08:43 AM   * DataPig  sprinkles sodium chloride crystals on Evl's battery
    <EvlMinion>  hey cut it out!
    <DataPig>  A salt and battery. :D
••
#297   2/20/10 02:30 PM   <blakespot>  It's cool that no matter what it is you do an image search on the net for, you will eventually see tits
••
#296   2/11/10 12:51 PM   <blakespot>  The most likely route to my getting laid on Valentines Day is a home invasion / rape
    <funkybutt>  blake LOL
••
#295   2/8/10 04:20 PM   <Lutfisk>  blake, we're supposed to get 6-12" here tomorrow - mind if we send it your way?
    <digicow>  snowspot: sweet. once it hits around 4', you can walk around pantsless outside and no one will know
    <jadin>  your genitals will probably know, and hate you forever
    <digicow>  jadin: blake's genitals already hate him forever
••
#294   2/8/10 10:14 AM   <FrauK>  whazzap dawg?
••
#293   2/3/10 07:25 PM   <digicow>  if anyone knows about wankery, it's Nac
••
#292   1/28/10 07:24 PM   <chino>  I am just not witty enough to make any quotes database
••
#291   1/27/10 02:00 PM   <flowergirl>  why is phil schiller so fat?
••
#290   1/27/10 11:10 AM   <Lutfisk>  posting the time as EST just reflects the east's smug assumption that the US depends on them for everything :P
    <NDPTAL85>  Nothing happens till the East Coast sees it. Nothing is possible till the East Coast believes it.
••
#289   1/21/10 08:24 AM   <Geeks>  I can sum up blakes twitter: "I hate my life; jesus fuck for all sakes this ass; god damnit! check out this iPhone game on TA. #iphone; jesus fuck I'd do her with a baseball bat"
••
#288   1/12/10 04:20 PM   <Nelluk>  what do you call the rooms that have a certain reduced level of airborne pollutants
    <FourOhFour>  clean
••
#287   1/7/10 06:48 PM   <blakespot>  I wish Windows 7 had a vagina
    <blakespot>  so I might force myself upon it sexually
    <blakespot>  in the name of violence and humiliation
    <Nac>  wow.
••
#286   12/31/09 06:43 PM   <blakespot>  my wife gave me a damned $25 gift card to GameStop -- "Hope you can get a good game with that"
    <blakespot>  WTF?
    <blakespot>  $25?
    <Toren>  maybe she'll let you use her anal plug
••
#285   12/31/09 06:18 PM   <blakespot>  If my wife sucked as hard as this dad did I'd be one happy man
    <Toren>  LOL you mean this day?
    <blakespot>  this DAY
    <blakespot>  fuck
••
#284   12/23/09 09:18 AM   * Zaren  fills out the order form for his digeridoo
    <Neth>  seems like there's a lot of stupid jokes for that, but since digicow isn't here no one can make them
    <InvisiblePinkUnicron>  We'll just have to manage without our full quotient of stupid for now.
••
#283   12/22/09 04:10 PM   <Toren>  i think somebody gave digicow a hystericalectomy
••
#282   11/28/09 08:45 PM   <ryan42>  that would be fun
    <ryan42>  open a new mac on the plane
    <iPhoneForker>  No way
    <iPhoneForker>  I'm going to trap the "new" smell
    <iPhoneForker>  Not tainting a new computer with pressurized fart and peanut smell.
    <Peanut>  ... what
••
#280   11/27/09 01:50 AM   <jadin>  i tend not to pry much into folks personal lives on irc
    <jadin>  at least if they arent volunteering it
    <irving>  oh right
    <irving>  first thing you said to me after a multi-year absence from irc was "still a virgin"
••
#279   11/20/09 04:53 PM   <Zamboli>  I want to jerk
    <Zamboli>  it is the hot new thing
••
#278   11/20/09 01:25 PM   <blakespot>  I am a master of javascript
    <blakespot>  but I am a busty man
••
#277   11/17/09 01:45 PM   <Nelluk>  i need to retrieve my credit card from the gay bar
••
#276   11/12/09 09:37 AM   <TheBoss->  KingDana you are only a porno queen
••
#275   11/5/09 12:07 PM   <Lint>  sometime i wonder how normal ppl's brains work
    <Lint>  becuase i donno WTF goes on in my head.
••
#274   11/1/09 10:35 AM   <TheNavyBear>  I currently have a setup using RhythmBox on roomies Linux server (which is plugged into stereo/tv). I have server set to connect to iBook using file sharing, RhythmBoc builds it's library from my iTunes library folder. I then SSH into server using X11 on iBook, and start RhythmBox, which plays through the stereo. The stereo in turn is turn also plugged into the second set of inputs on the speaker system in my room/bathroom (so I c
    <TheNavyBear>  listen in LR, Kitchen, Bedroom, and my Bathroom/Closet). I can then control RhythmBox from my iBook, the server, or by SSHing from my phone and controlling from the command-line.
    <TheNavyBear>  its awesome!
    <chino->  sounds complicated..
    <chino->  :-)
    <oldmanlee>  you dork
    <oldmanlee>  i use a remote control
••
#273   10/23/09 11:30 AM   <NiceDrake>  I got Time Machine to backup to a network drive ... but I want to actually want to backup to my user folder on the network drive. Anybody know how I can do that?
    <Neth>  rsync and kill a chicken
••
#272   10/21/09 12:14 PM   <blakespot>  I am glad there's no such thing as an adult fetus
    <digicow>  If there were, clarusworks would be one
••
#271   10/13/09 11:14 PM   <Gothik1>  i had more x-rays today
    <Nac>  do you remember the name of that character in South Park who yells his name and is in the wheelchair
    <Gothik1>  doc gave me more percs :P
    <Nac>  Do you know his name?
    <Nelluk>  jimmay
    <Gothik1>  lol
    <Gothik1>  TIMMAY TIMMAY!
    <Nac>  LOL
    <Nac>  I just made the wheelchair ridden dude yell timmay.
    <Nac>  Victory is mine.
••
#270   10/10/09 09:22 AM   <luckywrench>  seriously, that little computer cost me 700 bucks. I sold her to a 13 year old for 85 bucks
    <luckywrench>  it was an asian woman
    <luckywrench>  I wanted her, and gave her my card
    <angieinchains>  a 13 yo asian?
••
#269   10/9/09 08:34 PM   <digicow>  Last night I was talking to a young, good looking woman. She asked me if I liked breasts or legs.
    <digicow>  I told her what I really liked was a shaved snatch.
    <digicow>  Apparently I'm not welcome back at KFC.
••
#268   9/24/09 11:55 PM   <zamboli>  now you want to touch small girls
••
#267   9/24/09 11:33 AM   <blakespot>  funky-iMac: my wife is currently walking around the French Quarter
    <funkybutt>  really!?
    <funkybutt>  tell her there is a great leather and S&M shop on decator
    <funkybutt>  she can get a gag ball for you there
    <digicow>  and a new butt plug for her mother
••
#266   9/16/09 12:09 PM   <digicow>  today the caf is serving something called a "Trojan Wrap"
    <digicow>  it is, in fact, "sliced ham, salami, feta cheese, sliced red onion, green lettuce, topped with Greek dressing on a Wrap of choice served with chips"
    <digicow>  I'm guessing it's called that because of the greek dressing and the fact that after eating salami, feta, and onion, your breath will be lethal
••
#265   9/11/09 12:44 PM   <digicow>  unfortunately, on Crazy Cat Lady, I got bloodlust just as my haste trinkets procced, hit the boss with 45k dmg in about 2.5 seconds, drew aggro, and got one-shotted
    <Nelluk>  i recognize all the words in that sentence but it still doesn't make sense
••
#264   9/9/09 05:14 PM   * the_sun  (~bale@cpe-67-10-189-72.satx.res.rr.com) has left #macintosh
    <Lutfisk>  did it just get really dark?
••
#263   9/9/09 05:13 PM   * the_sun  (~bale@cpe-67-10-189-72.satx.res.rr.com) has left #macintosh
    <Lutfisk>  the_sun
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#262   8/13/09 11:39 PM   <Lint>  WHE N ZOMB I E S AT TACK! : MAT HE MAT I CAL
    <Lint>  MODE L L I NG OF AN OUT B RE AK OF ZOMB I E
    <Lint>  I NF E CT I ON
    <Lint>  Wow..
    <Lint>  im kinda suprised that formatted so poorly
    <Keifer>  no one is surprised when what you type looks bad
••
#261   7/26/09 12:35 PM   <funkybutt>  i've had them come in my mouth..but i spit them out
••
#260   7/22/09 01:31 PM   <ryan42>  digicow, i just had the most Darwin Award Moment in WoW ever.
    <ryan42>  I had it all planned out how I was going to take out this group one at a time... the first thing I was going to do was Polymorph the highest level one in the group.
    <ryan42>  so I highlighted it and hit the polymorph key, on the wrong action bar, and instead did Blink, which teleported me right into the middle of the group
••
#259   6/10/09 01:46 PM   <_dave>  My arms themselves never grow very long
    <_dave>  They're about a five on a beard trimmer
••
#258   5/31/09 06:54 PM   <HellzFirez>  http://nopaste.com/p/amEB8xdKg
    <HellzFirez>  check out that error
    <HellzFirez>  I am trying to run the .exe files that I scp'd to my ubuntu partition on my mac
    <HellzFirez>  and I get that error....
    <digicow>  uhh. .exe's are Windows executables
    <HellzFirez>  yea
    <HellzFirez>  won't ubuntu run them?
    <digicow>  you can't run them on anything but Windows
    <digicow>  cause... they're windows executables
    <HellzFirez>  I thought that Ubuntu could run .exe files.
    <HellzFirez>  Alright, thanks.
••
#257   5/29/09 10:17 AM   <Nelluk>  yoopers are barely human
••
#256   5/24/09 01:13 PM   <Nac29>  except she is naked and my pee pee is where it should be
    <Keifer>  your pee pee.
    <Nac29>  yes I try to be a bit tactful whenever I speak in this channel.
••
#255   5/21/09 02:25 PM   <Lint>  we have no unctonrolled internet
    <brandonlp>  i hope Lint doesn't get to make the WEP key
••
#254   5/15/09 01:52 PM   <CuriosTiger>  Lint: can I borrow $15,000 ?
    <Lint>  possibly, but not fro me
    <CuriosTiger>  Lint: why not?
    <Lint>  cc: im sorry you have to sign up for freelintreport.com for that info :)
    <Lint>  with enrollment in pendantic-advangate
••
#253   5/6/09 05:23 PM   <Nac29>  http://www.fark.com/cgi/vidplayer.pl?IDLink=4369161
    <Nac29>  wow.
    <Nac29>  Just wow.
    <Nelluk>  what is it
    <Nelluk>  im not going to click on it based on 'wow'
    <Nac29>  click on it you god damned worthless piece of michigan trash
    <Nelluk>  f u
    <Nelluk>  *** Signoff: Nelluk (Quit: leaving)
    <Nac29>  *** Signoff: Nac29 (Quit: )
    <Lutfisk>  let's bring them back for a curtain call, folks!
••
#252   4/26/09 10:28 PM   <brandonlp>  too bad csmoll isn't here. maybe he knows something about this since he works at an Apple Store
    * csmoll  (~csmoll@96-42-46-212.dhcp.eucl-nbb.wi.charter.com) joined the chat room.
    <Nac29>  :)
    <Obj-Cow>  Hah
    <Gothik1>  speak of the devil
    <brandonlp>  wow.
    <brandonlp>  That was scary.
    <tonyola>  you invoked the name
••
#251   4/25/09 07:48 PM   <DataPig>  Sauce is done.
    * Keifer  pushes DP in
    <DataPig>  Ouch.
    <DataPig>  Don't glaze me bro.
••
#250   4/24/09 10:07 AM   * _dave  could help with porting.
    <_dave>  But, I'm on ignore most likely still.
    <Nelluk>  thats because you are a dick
    <_dave>  Nelluk: Yes.
••
#249   4/22/09 02:46 PM   <MattBookPro>  is 7 lbs 2 oz heavy for a baby when it's born?
    <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  Sure, most can't lift anywhere near that much.
••
#248   4/18/09 10:06 PM   <brandonlp>  mmm urine
••
#247   4/16/09 02:18 PM   <Obj-Cow>  "having a stroke" sounds like it should be a british term for masturbation
••
#246   4/8/09 11:05 AM   <brandonlp>  i had a GameCube but my brother is an idiot
••
#245   4/6/09 09:10 PM   <dan-->  A lot of girls are attracted to the asshole.
••
#244   4/3/09 09:36 AM   <Nelluk>  dude ive already got giant dildos coming out of my ass
••
#243   4/2/09 11:22 PM   <chino>  ara is vncserver
    <chino>  isn't it?
    <Keifer>  no vancouver is british columbia :P
    <digicow>  Keifer: you should change your nick to Stretch
    <Lint>  keifer : ok looks.. irc is not the "mis heard song lyrics" game
    <Keifer>  !uneros vncserver
    <MacServ>  I think that's 'Vancouver'.
    <Keifer>  ha!
    <Keifer>  Score!
••
#242   3/30/09 12:58 PM   <digicow>  just got it up last night
••
#241   3/22/09 01:14 PM   * csmoll  = gay
••
#240   3/20/09 03:02 PM   <CuriosTiger>  i need brandon off my back
    <Zaren>  so roll over
    <Zaren>  he'll be on your front
    <CuriosTiger>  zaren: dammit
    <CuriosTiger>  you just made me laugh into the conference call I'm on
    <CuriosTiger>  now they all think I'm crazy
••
#239   3/20/09 03:01 PM   <blakespot>  I was under the impression that "Manchester United" was a rail system until two days ago.
••
#238   3/20/09 02:53 PM   <CuriousTiger>  wow, the internet is affecting me
••
#237   3/17/09 12:45 PM   <Nelluk>  the love of a paunchy, creepy older man is a love like no other
••
#236   3/12/09 03:36 PM   * KingDana  feels brandonlp's balls
••
#234   3/2/09 02:27 PM   <KingDana>  if you put clothes that are dripping wet into a dryer, is there any chance of it causing a fire or something?
••
#233   2/25/09 01:50 PM   <NDPTAL85>  Believe me when I say, I FUCKED A MERMAID!
    <blakespot>  NDPTAL85: where does a mermaid keep her vagina?
    <NDPTAL85>  blakespot: Its a hole in the front of her body below her belly button
    <blakespot>  just a simple hole?
    <blakespot>  no acoutrements?
    <NDPTAL85>  Yes just a hole, they're in the sea and it can't be fancy or it'll get infected
    <blakespot>  I think I like human female fancy vaginas better
    <NDPTAL85>  No one said you had to do em all the time
    <NDPTAL85>  Just one of those Bucket List type things
    <blakespot>  Well, you make a good point there
••
#232   2/23/09 10:41 PM   <DogCow>  i love how the Mac Pro tower fits perfectly in the space it fits in
    <digicow>  ...
    <digicow>  most things do
••
#231   1/19/09 09:30 AM   <KingDana>  I've played with myself
••
#230   12/20/08 09:21 PM   <Nelluk>  there's nothing better than dick
••
#229   12/3/08 01:28 PM   <blakespot>  I like to drink warm mayonnaise
    <blakespot>  if cow were about I'd add that I like to do so while chewing on an idaho stud
••
#228   12/2/08 03:31 PM   <Nac29>  there are Mexicans outside my window
    <Nac29>  I am a little afraid
••
#227   11/26/08 12:58 PM   <Nekokarasu>  Hm . Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo is still as much of a cock as I remember it being
    <digicow>  Is that good or bad?
    <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  I think that means he sucks at it
    <digicow>  ahhh
    <digicow>  yeah, I don't think I'd use cock to describe "something I suck at"
••
#226   11/19/08 11:57 AM   <brandonlp>  it's so wonderful when you've left for lunch..and then somebody sends you an email that requires you to be at your desk to look at a particular system
    <Nelluk>  then you reply with "cool your jets bitch ill be back after my appertif"
    <Nelluk>  lunch is sacred
    <Nelluk>  if anyone tries to interrupt me while im taking 10 minutes to cram a sub down my craw i give them the death glare
••
#225   11/13/08 10:18 PM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  Hell, just the buttset was like $300
    <brandonlp>  amazing how changing one letter in buttset changes the meaning entirely
••
#224   11/7/08 03:15 PM   <Nac29>  first obama press conference
    <Nac29>  the press core is masturbating in the audience
••
#223   10/24/08 10:31 AM   <rained>  you are all crazy
••
#222   10/24/08 09:59 AM   <FrauK>  that was one of the weirdest things when I was abroad
    <blakespot>  are you not still a broad?
    <FrauK>  nah
••
#221   10/17/08 12:08 PM   <Zamboli>  i like this channel, because people browse the internet for you
    <Zamboli>  they feed you links, it's like a highlight show
    <FourOhFour>  Zamboli: handy, isn't it?
    <FourOhFour>  Careful, though... one day you may be fed a goatse
    <Zamboli>  goatsex?
    <FourOhFour>  um... not exactly
    <Zamboli>  OMG
    <Zamboli>  i just googled that
    <Zamboli>  you fucker
    <Zamboli>  that makes me anus hurt
••
#220   10/9/08 08:49 PM   <Zaren>  HP TouchSmart PC commercial... oh, that's a sexy machine
    <Keifer>  you're watching ugly betty!
    <Zaren>  hah
    <Zaren>  so are you!
    * Keifer  coughs nervously
    <Keifer>  my wife is watching ugly betty
    <Zaren>  so is mine
    <Keifer>  ^5
    <Keifer>  we are men
    <Zaren>  manly men
    <Keifer>  but that was a sexy machine.
    <Zaren>  yeah
••
#219   10/4/08 11:54 AM   <Lint>  lookint he boto execute tab
    <digicow>  has it ever occurred to you to correct confusing typos before hitting enter?
    <Zaren>  that's a confusing typo?
    <Zaren>  You haven't been around lint enough :)
••
#218   9/30/08 11:00 AM   * EvlMinion  fires Nelluk1 out of a cannon
    <Nelluk1>  Heeey :(
    * Nelluk1  left the chat room. (Quit: leaving)
••
#217   9/18/08 03:23 PM   <NDPMacBook>  Eat me out
••
#216   9/8/08 08:51 PM   <KingDana>  penis are a pain
••
#215   8/28/08 02:12 PM   <Obj-Cow>  hrmm. that's not good. this and my other nick are on separate servers and the channel is not in sync between them
    * Obj-Cow  feels a split coming
    * StarfleetNDP  (~section31@207-180-136-61.c3-0.sbo-ubr2.sbo.ma.cable.rcn.com) joined the chat room.
    * MacServPro  set a ban on *!*@207-180-136-61.c3-0.sbo-ubr2.sbo.ma.cable.rcn.com
    * Obj-Cow  was promoted to operator by ChanServ.
    * Obj-Cow  removed the ban on *!*@207-180-136-61.c3-0.sbo-ubr2.sbo.ma.cable.rcn.com.
    * AdmiralNDP  was kicked from the chat room by MacServPro. (Begone, vile join flooder!)
    * NDPMacBook  was kicked from the chat room by MacServPro. (Begone, vile join flooder!)
    * NDPTAL85  was kicked from the chat room by MacServPro. (Begone, vile join flooder!)
    * StarfleetNDP  was kicked from the chat room by MacServPro. (Begone, vile join flooder!)
••
#214   8/18/08 02:31 PM   <Nelluk>  wow wikipedia even has a narticle about it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalamazoo_Tornado_of_1980
    <digicow>  there's a wikipedia article about fecal matter. Don't feel so special.
    <Nelluk>  and yet no article about you.
••
#213   8/9/08 10:18 PM   <NDPTAL85>  I am your hero. You look up to me.
    <Lint>  yeah he has to look up to you,, becuae you are on a lawn chair balloon ride
••
#212   8/7/08 01:41 PM   <blakespot>  Man, Enya just never gets old
••
#211   7/25/08 02:11 PM   <blakespot>  man, boobs are so cool
••
#210   7/7/08 11:52 PM   <Keifer>  wow, power outage
    <Keifer>  ~PBG4@c-67-184-202-117.hsd1.il.comcast.net] has quit [Quit: This may or may not have been an editorial comment.]
    <barrytoo>  there goes his backup power
••
#209   7/7/08 09:47 PM   <blakespot>  if you gave me all 3 at once, i'd do the guy too
    <blakespot>  who is that dude
    <KingDana>  its Nelluk!!
    <blakespot>  oh fuck
    * blakespot  slits his own throat
••
#208   7/1/08 02:09 PM   <Lutfisk>  It was a dark and stormy night. Somehwere, a turgid penis howled at the full moon.
••
#207   6/30/08 01:53 PM   <pac_mania>  i can't get over guys that inject saline into their scrotum
    <CatCow>  scrotum + needle = you're fucking insane
••
#206   6/28/08 01:18 PM   <Nelluk>  I totally grabbed one of my neighbor's nuts in the lobby
••
#205   6/26/08 11:51 AM   <digicow>  I would love to be in a 50ft cheese fountain
••
#204   6/26/08 10:06 AM   <csmoll>  look for a scruffy-faced homo in a flaming orange shirt.
••
#203   6/24/08 09:44 PM   <Lint>  i saw you go take a shit in their mailbox
••
#202   6/21/08 11:41 PM   <DrTekNik>  "In the long run, we are all dead." -- John Maynard Keynes
    <Eye_Mac>  don't take up long distance running?
••
#201   6/8/08 11:26 PM   <ClarusWorks>  old machines still aren't bad for word processing and suck
••
#200   6/8/08 11:25 PM   <Lint>  its a total clusgter fruck
••
#199   6/3/08 01:57 PM   <VetteRacer>  damn, sitting around the house all day being a bum makes me have to poop alot. WTF
••
#198   5/28/08 01:03 PM   <blakespot>  hm
    <blakespot>  the iPhone can sense 5 multitouch points simultaneously
    <Lutfisk>  what if you have 6 fingers?
    <blakespot>  You have six fingers on your right hand.
    <blakespot>  Someone was looking for you.
••
#197   5/21/08 12:37 AM   * DM8Mydog  (Coca-Coca@S010600060636d274.gv.shawcable.net) left the chat room. (i will come back when barrytoo is not there then i will get treated fairly)
••
#196   5/20/08 04:12 PM   <Nelluk>  et out of here, ghost. Get out of here, ghost. Get out. Get out of here, ghost. Get out of here, ghost. Get out of here, ghost. Get out of here, and don't you dare turn around and come back, for if you do, all the armies of my boot will kick you in the teeth, and you will be cast up, and thrown in the dirt, and thrust back to Perdition! And as long as I have teeth, I will bite you! And if I have no teeth, I will gum you! And
    <AdmiralNDP>  You need help.
    <KingDana>  lots
••
#195   5/20/08 01:57 PM   <hoopy>  G-WiZ-: that's not just kinda silly
    <hoopy>  that's balls-to-the-wall sillly
    <blakespot>  hoopy: is that the same as "gloryhole silly" ?
••
#194   5/19/08 02:54 PM   <Nelluk>  a cop who breaks the law is not necessarily a bad cop
••
#193   5/2/08 01:51 PM   * ircleuser  is now known as basma
    * blakespot  is now known as ti_rice
••
#192   4/3/08 04:48 PM   <Zaren>  just had a girl in the office signing out a laptop
    <Zaren>  taller than me
    <Zaren>  like maybe 6'3"
    <Zaren>  freshly washed hair - could still smell the shampoo
    <blakespot>  you should have mounted her
    <Zaren>  nah, her jacket was covered in cat hair
    <blakespot>  a little pussy hair never daunted me before
••
#191   3/26/08 08:35 PM   <CuriousCat>  I may be too far down on the wang
••
#190   3/26/08 07:01 PM   <hoopy>  it was a small onion, perhaps i shouldn't fuck with it
••
#189   3/21/08 10:03 AM   <KingDana>  Gotta tighten some nuts on my bed
••
#188   3/19/08 03:01 PM   <Nelluk>  its lik e a5 minute workaround
    <blakespot>  lik e a5
    <Nelluk>  yeah thats code for shut the hell up assface!
••
#187   3/19/08 02:43 PM   <Nac28>  digicow
    <Nac28>  will you be my new Nelluk
    <digicow>  no, I'm not into the gay thing
••
#186   3/9/08 04:02 PM   <Capn|Jack>  OS X is based on a linux version that doesn't compile on ARM processors
••
#185   3/9/08 01:09 PM   <Lint>  yeah we have way to many fake smarties floating around
    <Lint>  lke those fucking mentos...
    <FourOhFour>  if you're fucking mentos, you're using them wrong.
    <EvlMac>  that's disgusting
    <EvlMac>  but it begs the question..... does it look like a 2 liter of coke when you do that?
••
#184   3/6/08 11:08 PM   <barrytoo>  south pasadena california has made the 1st weekend in march 'profanity free'
    <CuriosCat>  Fuck that.
••
#183   3/5/08 12:38 PM   <Dogmatix>  don't ever think you can get away with bullshitting in #Macintosh and not be caught. if there's one thing we know, it's bullshit.
••
#182   3/4/08 05:00 PM   * csmoll  joins
    <csmoll>  woot
    * csmoll  leaves
••
#181   3/1/08 10:01 PM   <MattBookPro>  dog's bollocks = amazing
••
#180   2/15/08 04:40 PM   <clam>  One of my friends accidentally took down all of MIT's email by registering mit.edu.mit.edu as his hostname.
••
#179   2/11/08 08:36 PM   <NDPMacBook>  Ok so my tongue is here > | and Lalia Ali's butt is over here > | and what I would like is for those two points to come together like this > ||
••
#178   2/11/08 12:05 PM   <Geeks>  Just what I need, a fast panning zoom into my bride's clit to show over stimulation prognosis
••
#177   2/7/08 09:58 PM   <Lint>  my alphabits ssays 'ooooooooooooooooo'
    <digicow>  those are cheerios
••
#176   1/28/08 09:36 PM   <tonyola>  first time out of mom
••
#175   1/16/08 08:31 PM   <blakespot>  Noonian: i dipped my balls in your rice
    <Noonian>  blakespot: that's okay. I soaked the rice in hot sauce.
    <blakespot>  ..so did I
••
#174   1/15/08 05:46 PM   <Lutfisk>  I am the greek god testicles!
••
#173   1/11/08 09:58 PM   <hoopy>  my boss wrote a 186 line function that could be rewritten as: Date.Parse(aString).ToString("%M/dd/yy")
    <hoopy>  and this is why I want another job
••
#172   1/3/08 09:33 PM   <NDPTAL85>  blakespot: Whats that idiot who used to come in here who never got laid called?
    <blakespot>  samrod
    <NDPTAL85>  Right
    <NDPTAL85>  Samrod
••
#171   1/3/08 11:34 AM   <NiceDrake>  NDPMacBook, I haven't seen the creator, but for me I don't need to. I see Him in many things ... He's visible in different way, you could say.
    <NDPMacBook>  NiceDrake: So in other words, you hallucinate a lot?
••
#170   1/2/08 12:42 PM   <Nac28>  I have a monster crick in my neck
    <blakespot>  jesus I read that as "I have a monster cricket in my neck" !!!!
    <blakespot>  the horror!!!
••
#169   1/1/08 02:17 AM   <Kathia>  I have a question for you guys. when I am in a chatroom in yahoo no one can see the lines I type. What am I doing wrong? Help please
    <Zaren>  um... ask yahoo tech support?
    <Kathia>  Where is yahoo tech support?
••
#168   12/30/07 11:07 PM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens you cocksmoke.
••
#167   12/23/07 04:50 PM   <Gothik>  hey NDP, have you seen my pistol?
••
#166   12/16/07 12:56 PM   <MattBookPro>  NSString *digicow = @"<3";
••
#165   12/12/07 02:53 PM   <oscar>  So, I was talking to this person, sounded really hot, so i flirted with her a little bit, and at the end of the call, i said, thatnk you ma'am, and she said "Im a guy"
••
#164   12/12/07 08:58 AM   <SpooForBrains>  you know you're a father when you have three dairylea tri-bites and a pair of boy's underpants in your pocket
    <SpooForBrains>  well, a father or a kiddy-fiddler, I suppose
••
#163   12/11/07 02:58 PM   <NDPTAL85>  You know a codec just really isn't used when your a porn addict and you haven't needed RealPlayer in like 5 years
••
#162   12/10/07 04:21 PM   <blakespot>  i remember waiting 1:30 secs or so for a 640x480 JPEG to decode on my Amiga 1200 (14MHz 68020)
    <blakespot>  but by like 45 secs you could see the boobs and at least get started while the rest decoded
••
#161   12/9/07 08:37 PM   <NDPMacBook>  Ugh
    <NDPMacBook>  Colts score a TD
    <Nac28>  if you're gonna root for the team Satan coaches, can you at least not hate on the team Jesus PLAYS on?
••
#160   12/7/07 08:58 AM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  I've had the expensive escorts
••
#159   12/3/07 07:42 PM   <EvlPB>  cdiv: I fart in your general direction. Umbrella or no umbrella.
••
#158   12/3/07 12:51 PM   <^Jehova^>  ok
    <^Jehova^>  imac, emac, we all lack an imac
    <barrytoo>  some lack a clue
••
#157   11/30/07 01:42 PM   * KingDana  is now known as KingNDA
    <Nelluk>  shut up
    <KingNDA>  I have to
••
#156   11/30/07 01:41 PM   * KingDana  is now known as KingNDA
    <Nelluk>  shut up
    <KingDana>  I have to
••
#155   11/30/07 10:38 AM   <KingDana>  my goal was to survive for 3 days
    <Nelluk>  your goal is to undercover the truth!!!
    <KingDana>  I cant handle the truth
••
#154   11/30/07 10:17 AM   <Nelluk>  lol: Dave Waxman was in several gay/ bi porn flicks under the name "Dirk Hungus." I was hoping they would be listed here so I could buy them but where are they? I think one was called Log Jammin' Lumber Jacks 4.
••
#153   11/27/07 09:44 AM   <MattBookPro>  never run in a straight line towards a geth colossus.
••
#152   11/23/07 12:31 PM   <oscar>  My dog just screwed through my brand new apple keyboard cable
    <VetteFriday>  thats one horny dog
••
#151   11/15/07 03:46 PM   <irving>  i am a little worried about sex, though. i hear it can get sticky.
••
#150   11/8/07 02:47 PM   <Dogmatix>  I'm in a room about 2 metres by 3 metres... there are eleven computers in here.
    <blakespot>  Dogmatix: LOOK WALL
    <blakespot>  Dogmatix: N
    <Dogmatix>  buh?
    <blakespot>  Dogmatix: oh - I mistook you for a text adventure game
••
#149   11/8/07 01:02 PM   <_dave>  I wish I could fly
    <_dave>  Then I'd pretend I was a bird and crap on my bosses bald head.
••
#148   11/5/07 10:25 PM   <CuriosCat>  in other news, all this is totally dildos
••
#147   11/3/07 02:07 PM   <NDPTAL85>  God mother fucking dammit. I'm dying of hunger in the middle of a porn binge with lunch cooking in the microwave trying to get off one last nut before I collapse from low blood sugar and the fucking security rings my doorbell to tell me I have a goddamn package. And is it Leopard? NO. Its a goddamn rental commission check that some stupid ass landlord sent to me instead of to my office.
••
#146   10/31/07 01:55 PM   <KingAcula>  I am on Nelluk and it feels very comforable
••
#145   10/31/07 01:44 PM   <Lintenstein>  well guess what showed up via fedex
    <FourOhFour>  Lintenstein: a new and improved annoying personality?
    <Lintenstein>  404 : im gong to reprogram you with a large axw
    <MacForker>  FourOhFour: Quick! Maybe while he's unboxing the new one we can kill -9 the old one and then he'll just sit there quietly!
••
#144   10/31/07 01:31 PM   <MacForker>  How about William Howard Taft IN a wet tshirt contest?
    <MacForker>  woops, WW
••
#143   10/28/07 03:27 PM   <SillyJodie>  what a dumb nick
    <MattBookPro>  says SillyJodie
••
#142   10/26/07 04:56 PM   <irving>  clarus: cute? single? available?
••
#141   10/25/07 12:59 PM   * hugedick  (~harace@164.179.111.218.jb02-home.tm.net.my) has joined channel #Macintosh
    <hugedick>  hi
    * Mode  change "+b *!*harace@*.179.111.218.jb02-home.tm.net.my" on #macintosh by digicow
    * hugedick  has been kicked off channel #macintosh by digicow (some things you can just tell)
••
#140   10/23/07 04:55 PM   <AppIe>  Intercourse, PA
    <AppIe>  there's a Climax, MI too, iirc
    <digicow>  goes to show, even when the Amish have Intercourse, they're nowhere near Climax
••
#139   10/23/07 01:04 PM   <blakespot>  sounds like someone needs a rimjob
••
#138   10/18/07 02:37 PM   <barrytoo>  mm burnt penis
••
#137   10/17/07 04:04 PM   <barrytoo>  Humans Headed for Sex and Marriage with Robots by 2050
    <Nac28->  marriage? to hell with that
••
#136   10/17/07 11:41 AM   <funkybutt>  how can i tell what the file type is?
    <funkybutt>  i think it says WMV
    <funkybutt>  just says "click here for download plugin, then it doesn't help with that
    <funkybutt>  fucking piece of shit
    <funkybutt>  i could have gone to the store and bought a fucking radio in this amount of time
    <Spiffyman>  LOL
••
#135   10/15/07 04:07 PM   <G-WiZ->  agh i'm an idiot... i had a misspelling on the site's banner for almost two months now
    <G-WiZ->  http://nobleknights.lapdog.us
    <G-WiZ->  notice "integrity"
    <digicow>  this channel never notices integrity
••
#134   10/15/07 10:07 AM   <FrauK>  "Nicole will be happy that you are now his friend." uuhm, yeah.
••
#133   10/11/07 11:33 AM   <KingDana>  fuck you
    <Nelluk>  No sir, fuck YOU
••
#132   10/8/07 01:37 PM   <Zaren>  !p
    * Mode  change "+b *!*Zaren@*.umich.edu" on #macintosh by oscar
    * You  have been kicked off channel #macintosh by oscar (Not this time!)
••
#131   10/5/07 12:52 PM   <blakespot>  yay we get out @ 2:30 today
    <VetteRacer>  i had the day off
    <blakespot>  i have mon off
    <VetteRacer>  so do I, but its a holiday
    <blakespot>  my penis is longer than yours
••
#130   10/4/07 03:42 PM   <Gannon>  it was a trip seeing that old box
••
#129   9/28/07 11:12 AM   <oscar>  Active Bangs: chop, j, woot, decode, spec, mkds, music, banglist, cough, tuber, error, kickme, talk, p
    <Zaren>  !p
    * oscar  has left channel #macintosh
    <Zaren>  !j
    * oscar  (oscar@c-75-72-81-188.hsd1.mn.comcast.net) has joined channel #macintosh
    <oscar>  ?
    <Zaren>  !p
    * oscar  has left #macintosh
    * oscar  (oscar@c-75-72-81-188.hsd1.mn.comcast.net) has joined channel #macintosh
    <oscar>  lol
    <oscar>  thast why
    * oscar  has been kicked off channel #macintosh by CuriosCat (!p)
••
#128   9/26/07 09:52 AM   <][spot>  Lint: there's masturbation stories in the hebrew scriptures
    <][spot>  I point you to poor Onan
    <][spot>  who did spill his seed upon thje ground
    <][spot>  (I usually just get it on my mouse :-\ )
    <csmoll>  OWWWWWWW
    <csmoll>  MY EYEEEESS
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#127   9/13/07 12:34 PM   <funkybutt>  try #sextapes
••
#126   9/13/07 12:00 AM   <MasterKat>  its only about 6" too long
••
#125   9/7/07 08:32 PM   <Lint>  yeah tell is the the nead ofnixon
••
#124   9/6/07 08:11 PM   <staja>  Anal sex isn't as fun as you guys make it out to be =P
••
#123   8/24/07 05:38 PM   <Toren>  it might rain!!!
    <Sigma-One>  if it does while you're outside, it'll be Toren-tial rain :)
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#122   8/17/07 03:19 PM   <Nelluk>  my mom says i have a great sense of humor
••
#121   8/17/07 09:34 AM   <][spot>  "Your computer might be at risk." popup
    <][spot>  no shit - you're Windows
    <][spot>  ass
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#120   8/10/07 04:33 PM   <blakespot>  Neth: yea, Christiansburg is like a hemmorhoid on the anus that is Blacksburg
    <catchick>  and roanoke is the cooler town about 40 min away
    <catchick>  :)
    <Neth>  fair enough
    <blakespot>  heh Roanoke is the vagina
    <catchick>  lmao
    <blakespot>  and the land between - Taintsville
••
#119   8/8/07 05:24 PM   <EvlWeeble>  I might save up and try to get one of these core2 minis
    <@digicow>  if it had a video card instead of a cheezit soldered to the motherboard, I'd buy one
••
#118   8/6/07 02:46 PM   <k-d>  Bourne to be Wild
    <][spot>  Bourne on the Fourth of July
    <digicow>  Bourne to the Future
    <G-WiZ->  Bourne Too Many Times
    <csmoll>  Bourne and Bred
    <digicow>  The Bournth Element
    <tonyola>  Bourne Free
    <digicow>  Bournes on a Plane
    <poonah>  Citizen Bourne
    <][spot>  Bourne II: Electric Boogaloo
    <][spot>  Amazon Women on the Bourne
    <digicow>  Silence of the Bournes
••
#117   8/6/07 02:42 PM   <Nelluk>  apparently another author wrote two Bourne sequels after Robert Ludlum's death
    <Nelluk>  Bourne Legacy and Betrayal
    <tonyola>  Beneath the Planet of Bourne
    <tonyola>  Bride of Bourne
    <irving>  Revenge of the Bourne
    <tonyola>  Bourne Forever
    <Nelluk>  Re-Bourne
    <digicow>  Bourner and Furiouser
••
#116   8/6/07 02:07 PM   * FrauK  should really seek advice on which camera is best for her purposes
    <][spot>  photography under water is tricky, FrauK
    <][spot>  all kinds of factors are involved
    <FrauK>  I need a camera for concerts most of all
    <][spot>  ...oh
    <][spot>  I thought you said "porpoises"
••
#115   8/6/07 06:56 AM   <MasterKat>  now.. wheres that spare mouse of mine
    <blakespot>  did the declawing and detoothing process kill your other one?
••
#114   8/2/07 04:02 PM   <blakespot>  something significant is coming next week
    <blakespot>  I can feel it
    <irving>  it better be a 12" submacbookpro
    <csmoll>  I'll give you 12"
    <csmoll>  in two easy installments
    * irving  backs away
    <csmoll>  irving youre so adoreable you know that
••
#113   8/2/07 12:01 AM   <Keifer>  you need to go make love to your life right now
••
#112   8/1/07 10:04 AM   <ClarusWorks>  hmm. I need to find the best wy to get these dish cloths in my trunk
    <irving>  the ones covered in hooker blood?
••
#111   8/1/07 04:39 AM   <Nac28>  look
    <Nac28>  I'm not saying I wouldn't screw a real doll
••
#110   7/25/07 08:10 AM   <ClarusWorks>  blakespot: Post that in the apple II forums of the 68kMLA site or something if you want diggs
••
#109   7/24/07 12:32 PM   <blakespot>  Ok last time I'll pester folks with a digg request - but I'm almost on front page...
••
#108   7/17/07 02:56 PM   <clam>  ...I think someone just checked the alt.fan.lemurs FAQ into our project source tree
••
#107   7/16/07 10:36 PM   <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  I wanna new dung, one that don't stink, one that don't stain my pants, make them look orange or pink
    <barrytoo>  you have pink dung?
    <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  after eating cotton candy, yes
    <Lint>  oh the pain
••
#106   7/16/07 11:22 AM   <blakespot>  [ posts old Mac Plus screenshot image link ]
    * Nelluk  doesnt get particularly excited about seeing computer stuff he used 10 years ago
    <blakespot>  Nelluk: what is wrong with you?
    <Nelluk>  blake: I'm not messed up like you?
    <MasterKat>  Nell not messed up? *dies laughing*
••
#105   7/11/07 10:42 PM   <FourOhFour>  ryan42: Welcome to Fucked, population: you.
••
#104   7/9/07 09:43 AM   <blakespot>  If I were ever to "switch teams," it is David Attenborough whose bitch I would aspire to become
••
#103   7/6/07 04:56 PM   <Nac27>  she's [Kate Winslet] fugly
    <blakespot>  ur insane
    <catchick>  Nac are you kidding?
    <Nac27>  not kidding
    <Nac27>  very fugly
    <Nac27>  she is a cow
    <Nac27>  even after the airbrushing
    <Nac27>  her breasts... how to describe them...
    <Nac27>  fried eggs sunny side up and oozing, hanging from nails
    <Toren>  did we decide Nac can have opinions again? i thought we had vetoed them?
••
#102   7/5/07 10:29 AM   <Nelluk>  done any escorts?
    <KingDana>  couple
••
#101   7/2/07 04:43 PM   <CatCow>  then yank down on the bottom of the skin and pull it around the bottom
••
#100   7/2/07 12:49 PM   <CatCow>  my right hand is sooo cramped up
    <CatCow>  my hand is so stiff
    <CatCow>  I can't even masturbate with it now :(
••
#99   6/30/07 08:57 AM   <Tteclod>  the iPhone is making my new Razr look like a flaccid penis
••
#98   6/28/07 10:49 PM   <_dave>  My friend, who is a manager at an Apple Store, says he has five people online outside the store aleady
    <_dave>  5th ave is reporting 50 people
    * dprecosk  (~dprecosk@d206-116-247-62.bchsia.telus.net) has joined channel #macintosh
    <FourOhFour>  I am reporting one middle finger, extended in an upwards direction.
    * KingDana  shoves it up WinAmps ass
    * **  Signoff: dprecosk
    <KingDana>  hehe
    <KingDana>  I think i scared him
••
#97   6/28/07 04:19 PM   <Tteclod>  I will give up sex for a year to get my hands on the iphone
••
#96   6/28/07 11:40 AM   <ClarusWorks>  Someone needs to set INS straight. They're supposed to harass middle easterners and latinos, not Norwegians
    <CuriosCat>  ClarusWorks: The INS doesn't exist anymore, anyway
    <CuriosCat>  it's all DHS now
    <digicow>  DHL?
    <digicow>  we're fedexing illegals home?
    <CuriosCat>  digicow: No, DHL is the deportation arm
    <KingOuth>  They have international shipping for a reason
••
#95   6/25/07 08:43 AM   <digicow>  that dinosaurs never stop growing, by virtue of being reptiles?
    <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  that they walk among us.
    <digicow>  heh, yeah
    <BobBlec>  they do; they're called "Republicans" ;)
••
#94   6/19/07 03:48 PM   <Cardo>  bah, women suck
    <blakespot>  ideally
••
#93   6/19/07 11:36 AM   <irving>  i've got to cut down on cok
••
#91   6/15/07 03:45 PM   * Rocket625  likes it nice and hot
••
#90   6/14/07 12:55 PM   <Nelluk>  when i sold lint my old Lombard laptop i wiped the HD then installed some free typing tutor and set it to auto launch when he opened it. he was not amused :)
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#89   6/14/07 11:41 AM   <vegas_21>  I wanted to download the windows Vista program but I do not know if my system will allow it
••
#88   6/13/07 11:06 PM   <digicow>  so, you're hot, iWench
••
#87   6/13/07 04:03 PM   <digicow>  I want a girl scout
••
#86   6/13/07 08:39 AM   <Jedichick>  maybe tonight i'll get to be a lion
    <Jedichick>  not that that will help me any, but its better than being a bear
    <blakespot>  I wish you and Toren would keep your bedroom gameplan in priv msgs - sheesh
    <Jedichick>  lol
••
#85   6/12/07 01:51 PM   <funky-butt>  i had carpal release
    <funky-butt>  wiping left handed was challenging at first
    * funky-butt  looks around
    <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  rofl
    * blakespot  shivers
    <funky-butt>  did I say that out loud?
    <chino>  muslins can only use their left hand
    <blakespot>  funky-butt: I thought carpal release was when you got a handjob from someone w/ CTS
    <digicow>  wouldn't carpal release be a wrist job?
    <blakespot>  chino-: wiping w/ muslin is not a good idea - it can chaffe
    <funky-butt>  my coworkers say i had a handjob
••
#84   6/11/07 12:34 PM   <G-WiZ->  store.apple.com should read "lol you're buying a mac 10 minutes before a keynote?"
••
#83   6/11/07 10:03 AM   <_dave>  It's 10:03am; who else is drinking?
••
#82   6/10/07 06:58 AM   <MasterKat>  you know.. its odd working with an old hippie
••
#81   6/6/07 08:14 PM   * Toren  pokes iWench in the touche
••
#80   6/5/07 01:29 PM   <Mornx>  silly law
    <***>  bennyhinn (~not@203-214-135-178.perm.iinet.net.au) has joined channel #macintosh
    <KingDana>  speaking of silly
••
#79   6/4/07 12:43 PM   <MisterE>  I fell asleep on my arm the other day and when I awoke it was totally useless for 10 minutes
    <blakespot>  MisterE: ahh, you should have enjoyed "The Stranger" while you had that going...
    <MisterE>  damn blake you're the 3rd person who recommended that
••
#78   6/3/07 11:39 PM   <Toren>  i could go with my cousin and ride a real bull though heh
••
#77   6/3/07 07:36 PM   <CatCow>  I probed my own ass this morning
••
#76   6/3/07 01:15 PM   <bennyhinn>  shit i snapped the socket of
    <bennyhinn>  thats gonna be expensive to replace
    <bennyhinn>  god dam it, i shouldve listened to that guy who told me i should know everything before i open it up
••
#75   6/2/07 08:41 PM   <Nac27>  here's a tip
    <Nac27>  never walk into a Sprint Wireless store
    <Nac27>  it was like walking into a post-apocolyptic war zone full of starving people and I had a sandwich on me
••
#74   6/1/07 04:09 PM   <G-WiZ->  i had to main tank my 9mo daughter last night and hold baby aggro while my wife finished scholo :P
••
#73   6/1/07 01:55 PM   <bennyhinn>  why does exporting from imovie using expert settings never work
    <barrytoo>  because you are not an expert
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#72   6/1/07 11:20 AM   <blakespot>  Christ I come into the office even though sick, and get stuck having to work someone else's tool that's more bloated than anything I've ever witnessed
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#71   6/1/07 10:52 AM   <@digicow>  "I am in love with my sister. I want to have sex with her, but have no idea how I would go about doing it. That sucks."
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#70   5/31/07 03:13 PM   <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  If there were a jerry springer show for geeks, I'd have benni on it as the first guest
••
#69   5/31/07 03:04 PM   <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  Atma, no they just chat together on IRC. One night Toren got a little careless with his chat filter and now JC is knocked up
    <Atma`>  so his firewall broke and his packets flooded her ports?
••
#68   5/31/07 02:17 PM   <iRonin[LS]>  sounds like someone decided that scat from classic, high quality jazz (davis, armstrong, bird, etc.) needed the hip updating of modern lite jazz
    <blakespot>  iRonin[LS]: this channel prefers a lack of scatalogical discussions
    * iRonin[LS]  hits blake in the face with some poo
    <iRonin[LS]>  the singing not the bizarre sexual aact!
    <blakespot>  iRonin[LS]: you mean scat referrs to singing as well?
    <blakespot>  This realy throws Scatman Crothers in a whole new light, to me
    <iRonin[LS]>  lol
••
#67   5/31/07 02:05 PM   <blakespot>  never let anyone trick you into watching a video of a naked man rock-climbing
    <MacCanada>  blakespot: why? puts a new meaning to the saying "get your rocks off"?
    <FourOhFour>  ...
    * blakespot  shudders
    * FourOhFour  laughs.
••
#66   5/29/07 04:59 PM   <chino->  experience is the result of bad judgement
••
#65   5/29/07 02:13 PM   <bennyhinn>  does appledefects.com have the problem that my compute rhas
    <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  bennihinn: Unless wowdefects.com lists "Owner who can't even remove a keyboard," then no, they don't have the problem your computer has
••
#64   5/29/07 09:26 AM   <_dave>  ... is it the right or left arm that tingles when you're having a heart attack?
    <digicow>  left
    <_dave>  Good, then lets move on with life :)
    <_dave>  My right arm is all numb for some reason.
••
#63   5/25/07 10:28 AM   <bennyhinn>  my sister is going to make love to me
••
#62   5/24/07 08:05 AM   <blakespot>  4 of the top 5 computers in SETI@Home are Mac Pros
    <csmoll>  people still use seti?
    <blakespot>  yes why not?
    <blakespot>  to hell with folding
    <blakespot>  just find the aliens and ask them how to cure shit
••
#61   5/21/07 04:01 PM   <Nelluk>  i think my favorite thing about it is the line at the end, which just captures the new bond. i think its something like "Why should I need time off? The job is done. The bitch is dead."
    <dan->  Thanks for ruining it for those of us who haven't seen it.
    <dan->  Asshole.
••
#60   5/19/07 08:52 AM   <PuNa>  you never crossed swords?
••
#59   5/16/07 10:18 AM   <MacBook>  ARD 3.0's box is so small
    <csmoll>  don't you hate it when it's too small
    <csmoll>  can't fit all your junk in it
••
#58   5/13/07 06:55 PM   <InvisiblePinkUnicorn>  that's what I dislike most about a lot of those sites - how nastily they behave to the girls
    < NDPTAL85>  You've never had a girlfriend who wanted you to degrade her by calling her mean names during sex like "Ohhh you NeoCon you" or "You fiscally conservative supply side groupie!"??!?!?
    <MattBookPro>  if I wanted to degrade my girlfriend I'd call her samrod
    <NDPTAL85>  Really now
    <NDPTAL85>  Thats uncalled for
••
#57   5/11/07 03:33 PM   * KingDana  brings brandonlp to bed
••
#56   5/9/07 04:13 PM   <digicow>  there's nothin good about virgins anyway
    <Lutfisk>  cow: say that when you need a sacrifice.
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#55   5/7/07 10:59 AM   <Lala>  and the next is - lol - Its offical - im gay
••
#54   5/7/07 10:45 AM   <blakespot>  http://www.maryqueenoftheuniverse.org/prayerrequest.html
    <blakespot>  I wonder if that would help me with a tough block of code?
    <blakespot>  "I've got this recursive function, you see, and it's just eating up stack like mad - God knows how I might better implement this thing."
    <rocket625>  every call uses stack
    <rocket625>  make it a loop
    <blakespot>  ...God?
    <blakespot>  is that you?
••
#53   5/6/07 06:35 AM   <Nirak>  pink ladies are good.
••
#52   5/4/07 03:36 PM   <Nelluk>  NANA
    <Nelluk>  NANA
    <Nelluk>  AHHHHHHH RIIIIGHT
    <Nelluk>  hey.. you crazy bitch, but ya fuck so good i'm on top of it
    <digicow>  ...
    <Lutfisk>  coughs nervously
    <KingDana>  Wow
    <Jedicheck>  poor nelluk
••
#51   5/1/07 10:22 AM   <blakespot>  Of course, putting a small, framed picture of my Apple //c in my 6th grade locker was, I confess, really asking for it.
    * blakespot  shakes his head
••
#50   4/30/07 03:43 PM   <Jedichick>  luckily, no one ever quotes me
••
#49   4/30/07 03:41 PM   <Jedichick>  man i'm not talking in here anymore, now i'm known as some horse sex psycho woman
••
#48   4/30/07 01:09 PM   <Mornx>  _dave, so he's a retard, but that's no justification to insult someone
••
#47   4/29/07 10:52 PM   <CuriosCat>  whereas in the US, you can't even sell a food product unless it's hermetically sealed in 15 different wrappers
    <irving>  go buy a box of junior mints
    <irving>  hermetically sealed my ass
    <CuriosCat>  I want nothing to do with junior mints that have been hermetically sealed in your ass, irving :)
••
#46   4/28/07 08:37 PM   <Nac27>  so go to Sonic
    <Lala>  oo sonic
    <Lala>  i needa cock w/ easy ice pls
••
#45   4/27/07 11:31 AM   <rocket625>  if I had and ass load and an asston will they both fit in a buttload?
    <KingDana>  they should however fit in a fuck ton
    <FourOhFour>  I thought the metric assload was smaller
    <Toren>  i believe it goes buttload, assload, asston, fuckton, metric fuckton
    <Toren>  for some reason metric is bigger
    <Toren>  i guess europeans have bigger asses
••
#44   4/20/07 02:53 PM   <Nac27>  I've tossed salad for cocaine
••
#43   4/19/07 01:25 PM   <dan->  nelluk - OMG. you're SOOOO kewl! :)))
    <Nelluk>  i gnoes!!!
    <Nelluk>  {{{{{{{{ dan- }}}}}}}}}
    * FourOhFour  sets Nelluk and dan- on fire.
    <dan->  OMG! Hot tickle fire/pillow-fight!
    <Nelluk>  hot dan on nelluk action!
    <FourOhFour>  ...
    <Nelluk>  PONIES!!!
    <dan->  dude.
    <Nelluk>  too far?
    * FourOhFour  puts *!*@* on ignore and wanders off
    <dan->  you just crossed a line.
••
#42   4/19/07 06:57 AM   <blakespot>  FrauK: but .. you have girlboobs
    <FrauK>  indeed I do
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#41   4/19/07 06:53 AM   <FrauK>  man I really want a dick
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#40   4/12/07 11:23 AM   <rocket625>  I have hardwood with throw rugs no rumba
    <Bork>  That sounds so dirty
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#39   4/3/07 04:33 PM   <Jedichick>  my whole kitchen is cow theme
    <digicow>  Jedichick: sweet. When I sneak in to stalk you, I'll be invisible in your kitchen
    <digicow>  like camoflage
••
#38   4/3/07 03:40 PM   * Jedichick  wanders around
    <Jedichick>  i'm bored, i need something to do for an hour and a half
    <digicow>  oooh, me!
    <digicow>  wait, I think I read that wrong
••
#37   4/3/07 03:25 PM   <blakespot>  I need to get a solid UR for my mother in law - COULD give her my MX-700 and go Harmony if I choose
    <blakespot>  though she never thanked me for that inexpensive butt-plug I presented her with
    <Toren>  LOL!
••
#36   3/28/07 10:25 AM   <Nelluk>  man the shower at the gym is great. its like god is peeing on my face.
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#35   3/26/07 03:45 PM   <MacForker>  Wow, thats kinda creepy
    <MacForker>  I can see the blood vessels in the back of my hand
    <Nelluk>  you just noticed that?
    <blakespot>  MacForker: dude, look at your penis
    <MacForker>  blakespot: I expect oddities like that from my penis. Not from my hands :)
••
#34   3/26/07 12:53 PM   <Jenn`n`Juice>  premonition is a damn good movie
    <blakespot>  I had a feeling you were about to say that
••
#33   3/23/07 08:59 PM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  BLEGH
    <ShakenNot_Stirred>  Prozac tastes bad.
    <Lint>  youa rent suposed to chew it
••
#32   3/22/07 12:02 PM   <bennyhinn>  christ barry im struggling to find this spot
    <barrytoo>  its not obvious on slut drives
    <barrytoo>  slot
    <barrytoo>  ack
••
#31   3/22/07 11:44 AM   <ShakenNot_Stirred>  Push hard
    <bennyhinn>  thats what i normally do with sluts!!
    <bennyhinn>  erm slots
••
#30   3/21/07 01:28 PM   <irving>  i wonder where all the spring break kids are
    <irving>  probably at the beach
    <Nelluk>  not on your cock?
    <irving>  well that's after 4
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#29   3/20/07 06:04 PM   <annatoo>  i suck ass
••
#27   3/19/07 05:11 PM   <chino>  too muddy now for a naked run around the house
••
#26   3/19/07 03:14 PM   <blakespot>  Proces for making a vodka martini:
    <blakespot>  1) spear two olives, put in glass
    <blakespot>  2) place pane of frosted glass across room, perpendicular to floor
    <blakespot>  3) place vermouth bottle behind glass
    * Nelluk  smacks blakespot
    <Nelluk>  dont try to get clever with your vermouth
    <Nelluk>  the only "clever" vermouth i like is the winston churchhill method
    <blakespot>  ?
    <Nelluk>  gaze wistfully in the direction of france
    <Nelluk>  but do not pour any vermouth
••
#25   3/17/07 07:59 PM   <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  thats why I run OS X
    <GeeksOnMacBookPro>  less letters
    <Lint>  fewer
    <NDPTAL85>  And ladies and gentlemen we have come to the day when Lint is correcting someone ELSE's grammar.
••
#24   3/17/07 07:20 AM   <FrauK>  yum. nuts.
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#23   3/16/07 03:42 PM   <Macman>  wait a second did Leo just say "Jizz" on this podcast?
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#18   3/16/07 12:43 PM   <Toren>  apparently staja has the same homophonic typing disability that i have today
    <staja>  I have nothing agains gay words.
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#16   3/16/07 09:40 AM   <SpooForBrains>  it's got a bulbous bottom end
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#14   3/15/07 11:22 PM   <NDPTAL85>  Ford Model T is a direct ancestor of the H3 Hummer. The Ford Edsel however is a dead-end Netburst like design. :P
••
#12   3/15/07 09:09 PM   <FrauK>  fluffers are scary



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